Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About sniperkit : You've been trolled, you've been trolled, you have probably been told, "Don't reply to this guy, he is just getting a rise out of you!" Yes, it's true -- you respond and that's his cue to start trouble on the double as he strokes his manly stubble. You've been trolled, you've been trolled, you should probably just fold when the only winning move is not to play. And yet you keep on trying, mindlessly replying. You've been trolled, you've been trolled, have a nice day!
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Today, was my girlfriend's birthday. I planned it to perfection: we went shopping, bowling, had lunch in a nice Italian restaurant, watched a French comedy, walked by the river. She also got many presents. Tonight, I was exhausted but happy for her... until she told me her birthday is tomorrow. FML
Today, my sister and I bought new cell phones. We both wanted the same phone in red, but the guy told us that there was only one red phone left. Flirting with him, I said "You should give the prettier sister the red phone." My new phone is black. FML
Today, I was at ATandT getting my phone fixed. At one point, the salesman said 'you should see this'. It was a text message from some girl apologizing for sleeping with my boyfriend for the past four months, and telling me that they were moving him out of our apartment. FML
Today, I woke up to see my cat crawling out my window onto the roof. Afraid he was going to jump to the ground, I crawled out my window as well. I caught him. The neighbors caught me in my underwear and bra yelling at my cat on the roof. FML
Today, when approaching a stop light on my motorcycle, I went to extend my left leg as usual to balance when stopped. Apparently my shoelace loop got wrapped around the shift lever and "tied" my shoe to the bike. It's hard to look cool when you fall over for no apparent reason at a stoplight. FML
Today, I was feeling really horny. I decided to send dirty texts to my girlfriend. I sent the first and she didn't reply, so I sent more and more and then I got one back saying 'Stay away from my little girl.' FML
Today, I went to Lidl to buy the cheapest jaffa cakes I could. They cost 35p. When I was eating them later on I put the plastic wrapper onto the side. When I'd finished eating my jaffa cakes I went to pick up the wrapper... The dog had eaten it. Cost me a £150 vet bill. Most expensive jaffas I've ever had. FML
Friday 22 May 2015