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sneeze_watch's FML badges
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
sneeze_watch's favorite FMLs
by Username / 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/05/2011 at 6:37pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by chawlay / 07/05/2011 at 10:04am / United States (New York) / Work
Today, I laughed when I saw my ex-girlfriend in her overall uniform, thinking she'd got a job as a janitor. Turns out she's as professional marine welder. She's 22 years old and earns my monthly salary in three days. My current girlfriend who was there with me called me a loser in front of her. FML
by eatmywords / 07/05/2011 at 3:06am / Singapore / Love
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex in the janitor's closet of the pet store where I work. We were really getting into it when we were rudely interrupted by dozens of salamanders crawling up our legs. I had forgotten to lock the cage before we started. FML
by anonymous / 07/05/2011 at 12:32am / United States (West Virginia) / Intimacy
by Bekah / 07/04/2011 at 9:24am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
by monquiqui / 07/04/2011 at 1:45am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous
by wastedbaby / 07/03/2011 at 10:02pm / United States (South Carolina) / Health
by T-Guy / 07/02/2011 at 11:01pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by fthislyfe / 07/02/2011 at 10:06am / United States (Wyoming) / Love
Today, while I thought my brother was playing with my new phone, he was actually texting a bunch of my friends that I have chlamydia. He deleted his texts so I wouldn't see them, and I spent a half-hour trying to figure out why I kept getting texts of shock and sympathy. We're both in our 20's. FML
by Anonymouse / 07/02/2011 at 3:42am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Amanda / 07/02/2011 at 1:33am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
by Anonymous / 07/02/2011 at 12:46am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 07/01/2011 at 1:56am / United States (Missouri) / Health
Today, my dad gave me a speech about being gay. He said he'll accept me if that's who I truly am, but he wants me to think it over first. I'm an actor in a play. I had to explain the concept of wearing costumes and acting like someone else to him. For the third time. FML
by sealpop09 / 06/30/2011 at 10:36am / United States (Colorado) / Work
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…