sneakers9394

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sneakers9394

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 3 September 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 645
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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sneakers9394's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 5:20pm<b>dusthar</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 2:48am<b>Woody02284</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 11:15am<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 7:03pm<b>Way2Fast8</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:48pm<b>ArticFlare</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 10:29pm<b>Zaketh2112</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 8:39am<b>CC666</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 12:44am<b>DeadxTime</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 7:03am<b>LittlestPrincess</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 1:19pm<b>glitterfarie</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 10:24pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 3:57am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 11:19pm

sneakers9394's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

sneakers9394's favorite FMLs

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

by Taylor / 07/30/2011 at 1:14am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, after finally sleeping with a girl for the first time in I don't know how long, at some point during sex she managed to completely crush my balls. I acted cool until she left, then I had to wake my parents up at 3 a.m. to take me to the hospital where I was diagnosed testicular bruising. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2011 at 12:18am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2011 at 7:21am / Intimacy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited, and in the end the only thing that blew up was him, saying, "Oh my god, just stop it already." FML

by valerie / 05/27/2011 at 9:04pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was really psyched to go see Kung Fu Panda 2 at the movies. Excited, I tried to do a flying kick off the cafeteria wall at work. Instead of kicking off, my leg crashed through the plasterboard and got stuck. My co-workers had to pull me free. FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2011 at 8:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML

by 123roomielover / 01/26/2011 at 12:40pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized I'm pussy whipped by a chick I'm not even dating. FML

by mad dude / 01/12/2011 at 2:46am / Intimacy

Today, while on my honeymoon with my new wife, I tried to be romantic by installing a clapper to the lights in our room. As things progressed, the noise of our love making triggered the lights on and off repeatedly. She began to laugh and we ended up just calling it an early night. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2010 at 12:08pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, as I put my 4 year old daughter in the car seat, she dropped her crayon. She then paused and matter-of-factly said, "Mommy, I don't say 'f***' anymore when I drop things." FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2010 at 8:25pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML

by Anonymous / 10/11/2010 at 5:07am / Canada (Quebec) / Money

Today, while I was going down on my girlfriend, she fell asleep. She said she was too tired to fake it. FML

by Anonymous / 10/02/2010 at 9:34pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend wanted to prove how honest he is so he showed me numerous texts in his phone where he told other women he was in a relationship before asking them to sleep with him. FML

by Username / 10/02/2010 at 8:12pm / Love

Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2010 at 10:00am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was helping my friend create an online dating profile. When she got her search results, her #1 match was a blonde guy only 10 miles from her. His description: genuine, laid back, and ready for fun. He left off something kind of important. He's already married. To me. FML

by betrayed / 07/19/2010 at 1:36pm / United States (Missouri) / Love