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smw83

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smw83

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Las Vegas, United States
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 641
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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smw83's page activity

Visits<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 10:57pm<b>LadyLiani</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 5:12pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 9:29am<b>TrippingOnAcid</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 6:14am<b>draftskink</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 2:40am<b>Mons</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 7:34pm<b>Skycop_S</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 8:55pm<b>Artigedude65</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:23pm<b>hardcorefan16</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 11:16pm<b>skyttlz</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 3:21am<b>TheGolfGTI</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 12:20am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 4:29am<b>saphy222</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 4:26pm<b>halcyondaze</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 10:24pm<b>StupidMonkey497</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 9:44pm<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 12:03pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 5:34pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 1:45am

smw83's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of smw83's badges

smw83's favorite FMLs

Today, I was asked to prove that I was Chinese by translating the phrase, "Ching chong ming chang ho". I'm not even Chinese. FML

#21523696
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19468) - you deserved it (1582)

On 02/07/2016 at 2:03pm - misc - by Asian - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my 4-year-old twin boys are fighting because they both want to watch the SAME show on Netflix. They don't want the other one to choose, because somehow that invalidates their own choice, even though they both get to watch what they want, which is "Barbie, life in the dream house". FML

#21496646
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22961) - you deserved it (2259)

On 11/25/2015 at 12:13pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, while changing my daughter's diaper, I lifted up her butt to wipe her, which coincidentally caused her to fart. I hadn't wiped her yet so the force of air caused poop to fly at me at high speed, landing on my chest and face. My husband burst out laughing, saying, "You've been ass-blasted!" FML

#21496534
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25523) - you deserved it (2650)

On 11/25/2015 at 1:00am - kids - by coolest_mom (woman) -

Today, I decided to take a well-deserved shower. When I let my hair down, twenty six cents fell onto the floor. I have no idea how they got there. FML

#21478111
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21061) - you deserved it (3892)

On 10/10/2015 at 12:22am - misc - by kissandcontrol01 - United States (California)

Today, while having lunch with my grandparents, my grandpa's eyes glazed over, his head fell and he slumped in his chair. I started panicking and almost cried, thinking he was dead. Then he laughed and said "Just kidding. I'm fine." FML

#21477928
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25333) - you deserved it (2493)

On 10/09/2015 at 2:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a 60 year old veteran hit on me by pointing to his white hair and saying: "Just because there's snow on the roof doesn't mean there isn't a fire down below." Then he told me vets eat free at Cracker Barrel. FML

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

#21470966
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29277) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/21/2015 at 10:45am - misc - by Gassy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I sneezed while my ID photo was being taken. I look like a total moron in it. The photographer refused to retake the photo because I "clearly" faked the sneeze just to be funny. FML

#21469850
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23511) - you deserved it (1676)

On 09/18/2015 at 10:43am - misc - by allergies (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I dropped my toothbrush. Because I have the spatial awareness of a mentally-retarded gnat, I hit my head against the sink as I bent down to get it. Then I did the same on the way back up, almost KO'ing myself. My boyfriend saw the whole thing and nearly pissed himself laughing. FML

#21467535
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23974) - you deserved it (4502)

On 09/12/2015 at 4:11am - health - by dammit (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. When I went to change into tight jeans which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled: "It's the mommy show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML

#21454009
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24167) - you deserved it (2370)

On 08/09/2015 at 8:37pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I witnessed my dad wake himself from a nap with his own fart and start panicking in confusion. I guess I shouldn't have broken down laughing, because he demanded to know what I did to him. He didn't believe the truth and bitched me out for screwing around. FML

#21453366
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22963) - you deserved it (1995)

On 08/08/2015 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my wife handed over most of our son's college fund, in cash, to an investment scammer going by the name "Herp A. Derpson". FML

#21453336
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30193) - you deserved it (3499)

On 08/08/2015 at 12:02am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, as if having an old man shit on the floor of the busy restaurant I work at wasn't bad enough, my manager made a video commentating over the camera footage of me discovering said giant pile of shit, and shared it with the entire staff. This is going to haunt me forever. FML

Today, it was the first time a guy has shown any interest in me by calling me pretty. I was so shocked that instead of saying thank you, I hid behind the nearest object and promptly giggle-snorted. FML

Today, I had to pick my brother up from work because he broke down crying. I arrived to find that apparently, you can get so stoned that serving a pregnant woman at a fast food joint moves you to tears over the miracle of life. FML

#21409953
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31795) - you deserved it (2493)

On 05/14/2015 at 10:23am - misc - by sistertaxi - Australia



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