This member hasn't filled in their description.
smiliecat's FML badges
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
smiliecat's favorite FMLs
Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML
by Anonymous / 04/13/2014 at 11:17pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML
by Blood on my hands / 08/07/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Animals
Today, I was about to make a left turn. In the turn lane a little old lady was waiting for the light to change. On the back of her car was a bumper sticker that said "Honk if you love Jesus!" I gave her a honk and waved. She leaned out and yelled, "The light's red, asshole." FML
by TNDriver / 07/16/2013 at 9:12am / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation
by Lilly / 10/30/2012 at 2:45pm / United States / Animals
by Obi1Shinobi / 10/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous
- « Previous page
- Next page »
- Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His… Today, while I was going down on my girlfriend, she fell asleep. She said she was too tired to fake… Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his…