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smartyjenla

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smartyjenla

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  • Number of visits : 377
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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smartyjenla's page activity

Visits<b>misslostnfound</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 2:58am

smartyjenla's FML badges

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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smartyjenla's favorite FMLs

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

#20680679
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54995) - you deserved it (4277)

On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, for the fourth time this week, I witnessed my mother dancing around the house naked. Apparently, she is loosening up her "inner nudist" and isn't planning on stopping any time soon. FML

#20679387
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40103) - you deserved it (3230)

On 05/22/2013 at 6:56am - misc - by stillhave2years - United States

Today, I was getting out of my car, when my new neighbor asked if I'd help him unhitch a trailer. On my way over, he said, "Oh never mind, I thought you were a boy." I am a boy. FML

#20677893
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45625) - you deserved it (6532)

On 05/21/2013 at 3:05pm - misc - by Time for a haircut (man) - United States

Today, I took a nap, and I had a dream that my ex-girlfriend got back together with me. I woke up in a great mood. When I went back to bed, I dreamed that she broke up with me, again. FML

#20670246
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43438) - you deserved it (5679)

On 05/18/2013 at 1:22am - love - by Sarsippius -

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML

#20668592
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45814) - you deserved it (2916)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States

Today, I tried on a new perfume. When my boyfriend hugged me, he commented that I smelled like his mom. I don't know who was more surprised by the simultaneous bulge in his pants. FML

#20668540
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56272) - you deserved it (4763)

On 05/17/2013 at 3:21am - intimacy - by Uncomfortable (woman) -

Today, as usual, my mom got shitfaced and started berating me for something. This time, it was for missing a therapy appointment. Not only am I unable to drive, it was her appointment. For her alcoholism. FML

#20664501
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42529) - you deserved it (2447)

On 05/15/2013 at 2:21am - health - by the only sober one (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was leaving my doctor's appointment when a nurse stopped me. She exclaimed, "Wow you are so skinny! What's your secret?" My secret? Having an autoimmune disease. FML

Today, I tried to show my boyfriend's mom a picture of my prom dress on my phone. She scrolled to the right to find a picture of her son, naked. FML

#20642331
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42035) - you deserved it (73162)

On 05/05/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by beyondembarrassed - United States

Today, I was berated by a pharmacist, who said that kids these days are on so many unnecessary medications for "fake diseases". I was just trying to pick up the medication I've been prescribed to control my epilepsy. FML

Today, I was again turned down by a potential host family on a student exchange site. Their reasoning was basically that since I'm American, I might do something to endanger my health, get hurt, and then sue them over my own stupidity. FML

#20602754
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42304) - you deserved it (12386)

On 04/18/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by thanks, my fellow americans - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at a science-fiction convention, a woman came up to me and told me that my white face paint was a mess, my contacts looked cheap, and my costume was an all-round failure. I wasn't wearing a costume, I'm an albino. FML

#20551525
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44620) - you deserved it (2643)

On 03/19/2013 at 10:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, thinking my girlfriend had left her little black thong in the dryer to tease me, I sent her a picture of me seductively posing with it. She didn't text back, but a few hours later my 16 year old daughter asked if she'd left anything in the dryer. FML

#20539833
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21953) - you deserved it (48054)

On 03/11/2013 at 5:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally got a tattoo of an alchemy symbol that I've wanted for years. I also found out later that symbol stands for urine. FML

#20539190
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8674) - you deserved it (45043)

On 03/11/2013 at 3:43am - misc - by PeeLeg (woman) -



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