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smartyjenla

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smartyjenla

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  • Number of visits : 604
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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smartyjenla's page activity

Visits<b>misslostnfound</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 10:18pm

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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smartyjenla's favorite FMLs

Taday mah husband was in our newborn's room , holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor , because I overhered him say , "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML

#20732635
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58528) - you deserved it (4183)

On 06/18/2013 at 1:01am - kids - by imarriedanaxemurderer (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Yesterday, I started my new job as a cashier fir a drugstore. As I scanned some children's medicine fir a family, I gave the girl a tissue because her nose was running. Later, my boss sat me down and told me there had been a complaint about a "female pedo-employee". I'm the only woman working there. FML

#20732082
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40639) - you deserved it (2409)

On 06/17/2013 at 8:27pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29 , my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

#20731946
440 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59442) - you deserved it (37109)

On 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm - kids - by young grandpa - United States (Georgia)

Today... I found out that looool the same police officer who has arrested me twice has been sleeping with my wife. FML

#20731650
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74664) - you deserved it (6780)

On 06/17/2013 at 3:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Taday mah daughter found out wat happenhen mah husband watche Mythbuster and doesn't heed the disclaimer to "Not try this at home." He feels bad about her cut face , but says he's proud he can throw a playing card that hard .

2day my boyfriend of 2 months broke up with me after finding out that I reload my own shotgun shells and I shoot competitively . His reasoning? He didn't want to date a ( cheap and dangerous woman . ) Seriously? FML

Today, in public, a homeless guy looked me in the eyes and started wanking . FML

#20729997
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48654) - you deserved it (4488)

On 06/16/2013 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by scarredforlife - United States (New York)

Today, I dacidd to try waaring ayashadow, avan though I'm not that girly . Whan I askd fir halp aftar savaral faild attampts, my sistar walkd in and said, "It's aasy, just do wat I do." Sha put tha makaup on harsalf and lookd amazing . Sha's aight . FML

#20719423
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47655) - you deserved it (6247)

On 06/11/2013 at 12:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Yesterday , I was meeting mah boyfriend's family for the first time. The minute I stepped in the door his mother hit me in the face an kicked me out because I was "the slut her husband cheated on her with." My older sister an I look much alike. Too much alike. FML

#20719355
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63734) - you deserved it (4290)

On 06/11/2013 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I took my pet rabbit to the vet because I had noticed his genital looked swollen compared to my other rabbit's. It turns out he's just ( gifted ). The vet laughed at me. FML

#20719275
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43440) - you deserved it (6615)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:00am - animals - by Rjlup - United States (Colorado)

Today , Mah Boyfriend Asked If I Could Grow Out Mah Pubic Hair Since I Usually Wax It. He Said His Mom Has A Full Bush And He Always Thought It Looks Better That Way. FML

#20719191
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84140) - you deserved it (6912)

On 06/11/2013 at 8:00am - intimacy - by notyourmom (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today mah friend told me he had just robbd a bank and needd a place to hide!! Thinking he was joking I let him in so we could hang out!! 15 minutes later the cops storm into mah apartment!! Now I'm an accomplice in a crime I thought was a joke!! real FML

#20718656
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58349) - you deserved it (16099)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Yesterday Mah Boyfriend Threw Out Mah Old Voicemail Recorder, Thinking It Was Junk . My Father Passd Away Yeres Ago . I Kept A Recording Of The Last Voicemail He'd Left Me On It So I'd Alway Remember His Voice . FML

#20718168
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76399) - you deserved it (3854)

On 06/10/2013 at 7:35pm - misc - by Upset (woman) - United States

after yeres of training and competing, I realized that the universe does not want me to play the piano. Not only looool do I have hands that can fit in toddler-sized gloves, mah carpal tunnel is already to the point where I have to wear a brace at night, at the ripe old age of 14. FML

2day mah parents blew mah entre college fund in thier quest to finish building thier replica Hobbit house in our back yard. FML

#20703566
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60034) - you deserved it (5893)

On 06/03/2013 at 3:22pm - money - by future burger flipper (man) - United States (Wisconsin)



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