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slushpup9696

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slushpup9696

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3792
  • Number of comments : 466
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About slushpup9696 : No need to get mad at me. I'm just a cat sitting on a newspaper.

slushpup9696's page activity

Visits<b>stevengardiner1</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 1:00pm<b>x_hero</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 8:12am<b>mysteryguy3039</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 3:23pm<b>anothemy</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 4:46pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 8:57am<b>Agnesia</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 3:16pm<b>im_kevin</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 10:30am<b>xDochx</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:58pm<b>zarosian</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 4:35pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 7:45am<b>1915destroyer</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 2:33am<b>jakethegr81</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 12:02pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 7:27pm<b>TylerScatdaddy</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 1:08pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 1:08pm<b>mazinger_Z</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 8:45am<b>jubejube239</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 1:00am<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 12:41am

Liked!<b>mysteryguy3039</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 9:24pm

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slushpup9696's favorite FMLs

Today, I was told by 'Seventeen' to add liquid highlighter to my foundation for an all-over glow. Little did I know that liquid highlighter is an actual makeup product. I now have an awful rash due to applying the ink from a highlighter pen. FML

#6955134
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8147) - you deserved it (85481)

On 12/26/2009 at 11:18am - health - by rtrim29 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML

#6761205
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16961) - you deserved it (27540)

On 12/15/2009 at 3:32am - love - by Proof-Reader (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up lying on the ground outside with a horrible headache. I camped out in my tree house last night. FML

#6710619
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23719) - you deserved it (9209)

On 12/11/2009 at 4:55pm - misc - by B-Man (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my father asked my best friend to marry him. He's 38 and we're 18. She said yes. FML

#6593768
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53390) - you deserved it (2789)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

#6472262
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7269) - you deserved it (80389)

On 11/27/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by obsessed (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML

#6464723
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24133) - you deserved it (7683)

On 11/26/2009 at 4:13pm - animals - by smellsofeggs (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, I went to the movies. Not only did the movie end up being awful, but I came to my car to find out someone drew Squidward from "SpongeBob" with large letters spelling "I LIKE POTATOES!" on my windshield. In permanent marker. FML

#6298224
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27376) - you deserved it (2873)

On 11/14/2009 at 6:08am - misc - by squidwardpotatoes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my band played for our school. We were cheered for and everything. Being the lead singer I tried to look cool and push the mic away and pull it back by pushing down the bottom of the stand with my foot. It hit my face and I bled like crazy but I kept singing. No one clapped at the end. FML

#6297066
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8877) - you deserved it (33498)

On 11/14/2009 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got a letter in the mail saying I'm being sued by the guy that broke into my house last week. When I walked in and saw him, I tackled him, punched him in the face a time or two, and restrained him with zip ties. I now have to pay for his broken nose and face charges of assault. FML

#6195343
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46755) - you deserved it (4240)

On 11/07/2009 at 12:01pm - misc - by ShouldHaveLetHimTakeTheTV (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, in class, everyone read my Creative Writing submission. It was a touching story about the unconditional love that exists between dog and his owner. Everybody unanimously agreed that it was probably about bestiality. FML

#6050318
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27592) - you deserved it (6293)

On 10/29/2009 at 1:17am - animals - by Quirk (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was playing FarmTown and got into a fight with a 14 year old boy. I threatened him with physical violence, and he reported me. I'm 23 years old and got banned from a virtual farming game for threatening children. FML

#5841852
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7526) - you deserved it (57274)

On 10/15/2009 at 1:04pm - kids - by hatelittleboys (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87791) - you deserved it (14676)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

#5774504
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53043) - you deserved it (26902)

On 10/11/2009 at 11:42am - misc - by oxjessiiox (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, I was stuck in traffic on the highway and decided it was the perfect time to pick a humongous booger out of my nose. While carefully examing and admiring it, I failed to notice that the owner of my company was staring at me from the left lane in complete and utter revulsion. FML

#5735299
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7609) - you deserved it (45103)

On 10/09/2009 at 3:09am - work - by whitedevil (man) - United States (California)

Today, it was my friend's paintball party and we were doing it in a forest nearby. When I arrived at his house, his parents said they already started, so I geared up and went out there to find that there was a note on a tree. It said 'Sorry', and then twenty people jumped from bushes and ambushed me. FML

#5699307
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34237) - you deserved it (11260)

On 10/07/2009 at 7:13am - misc - by shitballs_911 (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames)



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