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slooby

Offline (the 09/28/2014 at 1:58am) | Search for a member

slooby

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4285
  • Number of comments : 200
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About slooby : You don't fool me, Effy Stonem

slooby's page activity

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slooby's FML badges

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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slooby's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife and I were doing it when the phone rang. She answered it, and rode me while carrying on a more than a five minute conversation with her father. FML

#5211678
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23441) - you deserved it (3697)

On 09/12/2009 at 6:13pm - intimacy - by 0ros (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, whilst on a date I recieved my sixth missed call from my mother. I excused myself and went outside and called her, she and my father wanted to know why I was having dinner and holding hands with another man. It turns out they were also on a date. At the same place. FML

#4950389
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43022) - you deserved it (10774)

On 08/31/2009 at 9:54am - love - by crawfo (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I finally told my mom I am a lesbian. She started laughing and said 'Good one honey'. I told her I wasn't joking, and she took my face in her hands and said 'You ARE joking!' Then she left. FML

#4465464
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62148) - you deserved it (9125)

On 08/12/2009 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend and parents went out to dinner. As we started the meal, my boyfriend proposed and the restaurant burst into applause. My mother said without hesitation and a large scowl, "If you say yes, I'm leaving." FML

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

#2182938
388 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83343) - you deserved it (10211)

On 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm - intimacy - by herve (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I went shopping with my sister. Looking for something to say, I told her how one of my friends had been burgled. Then I realised it was Bree on Desperate Housewives. FML

#2010345
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15703) - you deserved it (55877)

On 05/17/2009 at 9:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Wexford)

Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML

#1927832
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61995) - you deserved it (5798)

On 05/14/2009 at 11:24am - kids - by TwinDad (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my daughter walked in on me taking a shower. She said, "Hey, yours is the same size as Dylan's!" My daughter has seen Dylan's penis, which apparently is the same size as mine. My daughter and Dylan are 7. FML

#1409707
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105741) - you deserved it (8227)

On 04/27/2009 at 11:06pm - intimacy - by seriouslywtf (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at the store with my wife. As we were walking out, I helped an elderly woman get through the door. As I was opening the door, my foot got stuck on the door and my face was catapulted into the woman's breasts. It wasn't until we got into the car that my wife burst into hysterics. FML

#1310599
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44162) - you deserved it (4238)

On 04/25/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by GreenMonstR (man) - United States (California)

Today, for my mom's 50th birthday all she wanted was this gold bracelet. It was too much money for me to buy so I bought the same one in silver. Right before I gave it to her, my older sister gave her the gold bracelet which made her cry. When I gave her my present she just said "oh." FML

#1105841
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63601) - you deserved it (5034)

On 04/19/2009 at 12:27am - misc - by ohhotdamn (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was selling cookie dough for a fund raiser at an old folks home. One lady ordered a box and told me that she loved cookie dough. I told her it'd be here in 4 weeks, she said "Oh I can't wait!". Not really thinking, as I left I said, "I hope you can make it till then!". FML

#891660
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10377) - you deserved it (61417)

On 04/09/2009 at 8:16pm - misc - by phatkroger10 (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I thought I heard my little sister playing on my brand new grand piano. Angry, I ran downstairs to stop her. My parents were having sex. On my piano. FML

#800425
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (283936) - you deserved it (19083)

On 04/04/2009 at 2:15pm - intimacy - by GuitarChick42 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML

#794025
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71033) - you deserved it (18395)

On 04/04/2009 at 12:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend dropped me off for a class and I accidentally closed my exceptionally baggy pants in the passenger door. She didn't notice and started to drive away. I spent the next fifteen seconds being dragged across rough pavement with my pants around my ankles. FML

#661204
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53016) - you deserved it (33856)

On 03/28/2009 at 1:17pm - misc - by enriquegay (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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