About slippy327 : I am a human being. I am not some kind of evil cat, plotting to rule the world and destroy humanity. Trust me, I am not a cat.
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slippy327's favorite FMLs
Today, I was trying to study for a test when my brother and his friends decided to play the chant game, meaning one person yells something weird and everyone else has to say it back without laughing. All I heard for about two hours was them yelling things like, "DICK NIPPLES." FML
by DIY560 / 02/23/2014 at 10:59pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friends and I went camping in the woods. I fell asleep first. Waking up hours later to them bunched up together in the middle of the tent and me half-way outside, I confronted them about it. They admitted, "We heard a bear so we needed a sacrifice." FML
by bear food / 01/07/2014 at 11:37pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by honeybunny90 / 12/28/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by 00bsg / 12/21/2013 at 10:46am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by Well this Is Awkward / 12/17/2013 at 3:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Teiu88 / 10/20/2013 at 10:34am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by nofriends / 10/19/2013 at 5:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML
by overly nationalistic redneck / 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/16/2013 at 1:37pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, in revenge for me pulling the old salt-in-the-soda prank on him, my dad showed up at my college dressed in a tight blouse and miniskirt, demanding that I come home early with him. I think I'm going to be lynched next time I go to class. FML
by HSampsON / 10/13/2013 at 5:20pm / Niger (Niamey) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/02/2013 at 8:17am / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, I bought a live lobster to have for dinner. When my four year old daughter discovered it in the cooler, she thanked me incessantly for finally getting her a pet. She now won't let "Mr. Shelly" out of her sight. FML
by meganmagee / 09/16/2013 at 2:47pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids
Today, I went to a suicide prevention walk with a girl I like. Before the walk, we bought balloons to set free when they called the names of the deceased. To buy a balloon, you had to write a name on a sheet. Apparently, you weren't supposed to write your own. They called my name. FML
by Anonymous / 09/09/2013 at 7:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML
by Anonymous / 09/03/2013 at 12:13am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by grossedout / 08/29/2013 at 12:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous