slippy327

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slippy327

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2820
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About slippy327 : I am a human being. I am not some kind of evil cat, plotting to rule the world and destroy humanity. Trust me, I am not a cat.

slippy327's page activity

Visits<b>kalibos666</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 10:35pm<b>crazy_bananas</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 1:38am<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 6:48am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:32pm<b>eyepuppy</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 2:19pm<b>zAstonish</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 2:38am<b>spencerpajari</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 4:30pm<b>CoonAlmighty</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 5:31pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 6:15am<b>khoov19</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:45pm<b>Niz_DD</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 5:13pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 9:37pm<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 8:35pm<b>coldashell</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 8:34pm<b>cheeeksss</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 9:29am<b>aliceablaze</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:27am<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 5:11am<b>sam882</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 6:32am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 9:32pm

slippy327's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of slippy327's badges

slippy327's favorite FMLs

Today, I was stuck on a campus tour with my subtly racist mother who, in an attempt to seem open-minded, deemed it appropriate to refer to our black tour guide as "Sistah". FML

by look how totally not racist I am! / 07/10/2014 at 11:32pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was interviewing a woman for a job. She told me that she may need days off because of her artistic son. I jokingly replied, "Does he color on the walls or something?" She then stared at me with a weird look on her face. Autistic, her son is autistic. FML

by dammit hearing aid / 07/10/2014 at 6:17pm / United States (Iowa) / Work

Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for over a week. I finally snapped. When I was done ranting, she murmured, "Baby, don't be cray-cray". FML

by oh my fucking god / 07/10/2014 at 9:34am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Love

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2014 at 4:22pm / Spain (Comunidad Valenciana) / Animals

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

by failed dad / 06/25/2014 at 8:30am / Greece (Attiki) / Kids

Today, after being a vegetarian for 5 years, I found out that my boyfriend of 2 years has secretly been feeding me meat. His reason is that he thinks it's "funny" that I still call myself a vegetarian afterwards. FML

by secret meat / 06/20/2014 at 10:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, my husband reorganized our fridge for the World Cup. He cleared everything out and filled it with beer and chips. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2014 at 1:02am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was spinning some yarn around to make my new cat run in circles. After about 10 seconds, he stopped going in circles and went straight ahead, happily running several feet into the wall and knocking himself out. My bowel movements have more brain-power than this thing. FML

by jaqen h'garrrhghhgfgjhfuck / 06/09/2014 at 5:45pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Animals

Today, despite years of paranoid checking, I forgot to check my towel for spiders after my shower. Two crawled onto me, and I'm pretty sure there's one somewhere in my hair. FML

by Anonymous / 06/03/2014 at 4:56am / United Kingdom (Essex) / Animals

Today, I was at a buffet with my kids and husband. As my boys got up to get more food, I told them they'd better come back with something green on their plate. They both came back with mint ice cream and got a high-five from my husband. FML

by outsmartedbykids / 05/28/2014 at 12:28pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, I flexed so hard for a selfie, I gave myself a hernia. FML

by ShutTheFuCupcake / 05/13/2014 at 7:46pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

by Brody89 / 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, my students all handed in their 1,000 word papers. The assignment was for them to write about a strong, benevolent leader who influenced the world. Around half of the papers were about Hitler. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2014 at 7:30am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I was randomly selected for a pat-down while at the airport. Being from the south, I said thanks out of pure habit. The guy replied, "No sir, thank YOU." and winked. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2014 at 4:30pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, the girl I've been dating dumped me after she found out I'm originally from Alabama. Apparently she doesn't want to date someone from a "foreign country". We both live in Michigan. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2014 at 3:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Love