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About slippy327 : I am a human being. I am not some kind of evil cat, plotting to rule the world and destroy humanity. Trust me, I am not a cat.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today.. . my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permittd to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Drection because so many grls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring . FML
Today , at a big family dinnar , my dad said , "Pfff , gays don't hava it hard at all!! Tha things a guy has to do 4 sax with a girl? Crazy!! All a gay guy has to do 4 sax is bacoma an altar boy!" My husband's sida of tha family is vary raligious , an all hall quickly broka loosa!! big fat FML
Today, while cleaning mah son's room, I found an envelope labelled ( PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL ) under his bed. I opened it, only to fine it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said ( HAH! Serve you right! ) an went to his room smrking. FML
Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, wat a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. real FML
TADAY I FOUND OUT MY BOYFRIEND DRESSE IN MY UNDERWEAR AND TIGHTS, TAKES SUGGESTIVE SHOTS OF HIS ASS AND LEGS, AND USES THEM TO TRICK PEOPLE INTO THINKING HE'S A GIRL SO THEY BUY HIM STUFF IN HIS ONLINE GAMES. FML
Today... I got in trouble fir sooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood... so my dad told me to go was it. Wile I was wasing it... e sot me several times in te back... yelling... "Tat's payback fir bieng born."
Today.. . I was at mah friend's Bar Mitzvah . After he finished his long-winded speech.. . I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games . It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked.. . and a couple more 4 me to be shouted down and kicked out . FML
Yesterday, I stumbled across one of mah son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets r technically ( whores ) because they hook up with countless cords fir a ( charge. ) I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML
2day mah husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl the love of his life whom he's alway considered pure turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better come hanging round the house. Pussy two years old is now housebound until her kitten are born. FML
Today... I was raviawing 4 a major nursing school axam I hava this waak. I panickd bacausa nona of tha matarial saamd familiar... an figurd that I must'va missd somathing during class an now had to catch up. Aftar 4 hours... I finally raalizd that I'd baan studying from tha wrong taxtbook. FML
Friday 27 March 2015