Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

slippy327

Online | Search for a member

slippy327

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1911
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About slippy327 : I am a human being. I am not some kind of evil cat, plotting to rule the world and destroy humanity. Trust me, I am not a cat.

slippy327's page activity

Visits<b>CoonAlmighty</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 5:31pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 6:15am<b>khoov19</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:45pm<b>Niz_DD</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 5:13pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 9:37pm<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 8:35pm<b>coldashell</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 8:34pm<b>cheeeksss</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 9:29am<b>aliceablaze</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:27am<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 5:11am<b>sam882</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 6:32am<b>Aes0p</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 7:36am<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 2:33pm<b>snorgia</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 12:26am<b>becausefuckyou</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 10:31pm<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 6:54am<b>gotaplanstan</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 2:06am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 4:03am

slippy327's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of slippy327's badges

slippy327's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent an hour trying to sleep before work, but I couldn't because my two dogs wouldn't stop barking. Completely pissed off, I finally went and told the little fuck nuggets to shut the shit up. I was then immediately knocked unconscious by the burglar in my house. FML

Today, I accidentally dropped and shattered my small bathroom mirror. My sister came to see what was going on, took one look at the shattered mirror, and said, "About time you put it out if its misery." FML

#21458446
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20213) - you deserved it (2426)

On 08/20/2015 at 12:18pm - misc - by fuck you btichass cuntshit (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML

#21450341
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23985) - you deserved it (5628)

On 08/01/2015 at 4:29am - animals - by funnnyyyyy -_- (woman) - Nepal

Today, I found out my dog's new favorite game to play: "If you don't stop petting me, I'll bite your balls as hard as I can." FML

Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML

#21414003
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31243) - you deserved it (2229)

On 05/22/2015 at 1:10pm - misc - by homo fuckofftus (man) - United States (California)

Today, in bare consciousness, I found out what it feels like to be stabbed in the hand with an earring. How? By slamming my hand on the snooze button of my alarm and missing horribly. FML

#21411522
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25158) - you deserved it (6103)

On 05/17/2015 at 3:32pm - misc - by norpedo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while mowing my backyard, I messily discovered that a family of rabbits has been living out there in the tall grass. FML

#21410882
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33574) - you deserved it (5353)

On 05/16/2015 at 7:47am - animals - by yif2 (woman) - United States

Today, I came home to find my dad drinking. Trying to be cheerful, I greeted him with a "Hi, dad!" He sighed, shook his head, and said "It hurts me when you call me that." FML

#21410667
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30637) - you deserved it (2007)

On 05/15/2015 at 7:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML

#21409928
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32644) - you deserved it (7090)

On 05/14/2015 at 8:42am - work - by HiddlePuff - Australia

Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put it in a box on my bed. I never had a tarantula, and the box was empty when I checked. FML

#21409835
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30089) - you deserved it (2384)

On 05/14/2015 at 1:11am - animals - by cricketsins (woman) - United States

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

#21401833
101 comments

Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML

#21392458
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30161) - you deserved it (5475)

On 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was driving and someone was following me across the city and wouldn't let up, so I drove past my house, thinking it was a stalker. Eventually I lost them on the highway. It wasn't until I'd gotten back home that I remembered that my 'stalker' was a coworker I'd invited over for lunch. FML

#21390746
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15502) - you deserved it (38734)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:11pm - work - by Distracted (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17613) - you deserved it (32956)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • RoSaCe's illustrated FML
  • Back to business! Yep, everyone is back from their vacation, unless you're a rich, childfree, lovin' life-type of person who doesn't go on holiday when everybody else does, and can do whatever they…

Friday 4 September 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: