Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (20 hours ago) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2054
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About slippy327 : I am a human being. I am not some kind of evil cat, plotting to rule the world and destroy humanity. Trust me, I am not a cat.

slippy327's page activity

Visits<b>spencerpajari</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 4:30pm<b>CoonAlmighty</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 5:31pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 6:15am<b>khoov19</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:45pm<b>Niz_DD</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 5:13pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 9:37pm<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 8:35pm<b>coldashell</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 8:34pm<b>cheeeksss</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 9:29am<b>aliceablaze</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:27am<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 5:11am<b>sam882</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 6:32am<b>Aes0p</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 7:36am<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 2:33pm<b>snorgia</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 12:26am<b>becausefuckyou</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 10:31pm<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 6:54am<b>gotaplanstan</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 2:06am

slippy327's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of slippy327's badges

slippy327's favorite FMLs

Today, I invited a girl back to my house and she seemed cool. I then left to go to the toilet. When I came back, there was a giant wet patch on the rug. The girl then blamed it on my dog, whose picture is on the wall. My dog died last week. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24208) - you deserved it (1642)

On 09/16/2015 at 2:26pm - animals - by Urinator - United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross)

Today, my teacher plugged the speakers into the wrong input on his computer, and said, "Oops, wrong hole", to which one of the students who often makes the same mistake said, "Story of my life". I understood it differently and started laughing. It would have been fine if the teacher wasn't her father. FML

Today, I told my nephew to be careful when crossing the street in front of a bus because it might eat him. We then watched as a bus slowed down and stopped in front of a group of people. When the bus moved away, all the people were gone. My nephew is terrified, and won't stop crying. FML


I agree, your life sucks (15573) - you deserved it (19887)

On 09/11/2015 at 8:32pm - kids - by busmonster - United States (Virginia)

Today, I spent an hour trying to sleep before work, but I couldn't because my two dogs wouldn't stop barking. Completely pissed off, I finally went and told the little fuck nuggets to shut the shit up. I was then immediately knocked unconscious by the burglar in my house. FML

Today, I accidentally dropped and shattered my small bathroom mirror. My sister came to see what was going on, took one look at the shattered mirror, and said, "About time you put it out if its misery." FML


I agree, your life sucks (20769) - you deserved it (2489)

On 08/20/2015 at 12:18pm - misc - by fuck you btichass cuntshit (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24596) - you deserved it (5992)

On 08/01/2015 at 4:29am - animals - by funnnyyyyy -_- (woman) - Nepal

Today, I found out my dog's new favorite game to play: "If you don't stop petting me, I'll bite your balls as hard as I can." FML

Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31393) - you deserved it (2244)

On 05/22/2015 at 1:10pm - misc - by homo fuckofftus (man) - United States (California)

Today, in bare consciousness, I found out what it feels like to be stabbed in the hand with an earring. How? By slamming my hand on the snooze button of my alarm and missing horribly. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25256) - you deserved it (6127)

On 05/17/2015 at 3:32pm - misc - by norpedo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while mowing my backyard, I messily discovered that a family of rabbits has been living out there in the tall grass. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33596) - you deserved it (5356)

On 05/16/2015 at 7:47am - animals - by yif2 (woman) - United States

Today, I came home to find my dad drinking. Trying to be cheerful, I greeted him with a "Hi, dad!" He sighed, shook his head, and said "It hurts me when you call me that." FML


I agree, your life sucks (31546) - you deserved it (2219)

On 05/15/2015 at 7:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33599) - you deserved it (7592)

On 05/14/2015 at 8:42am - work - by HiddlePuff - Australia

Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put it in a box on my bed. I never had a tarantula, and the box was empty when I checked. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30160) - you deserved it (2388)

On 05/14/2015 at 1:11am - animals - by cricketsins (woman) - United States

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML


G.E. Gallas's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • G.E. Gallas's illustrated FML
  • Hardcore will never die, but you will. We’re back with some rock n roll, or dare I say it, some punk rock. Don't run away, it's not that terrible stuff that emo kids listen to while slashing their…

Friday 2 October 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: