About slimilicious : Just a bored nineteen year old, here to read about other people's shitty lives in order to make myself feel better about my own.
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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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slimilicious's favorite FMLs
Today, a little girl standing next to me on the train suddenly hugged me. I thought maybe she was sad or I reminded her of someone, and hugged her back. Then she smiled, squeezed my lovehandles, and said "Honk, honk!" FML
by squeezable / 06/19/2009 at 1:48pm / United States (New York) / Transportation
Today, I was reading through a local wedding mag's advice page. A mother-in-law to be was writing about how to handle wanting her son to break off his engagement. I thought, "Wow. That must suck. I'm glad I like my mother-in-law to be." And then I saw her name. FML
by Anonymous / 06/04/2009 at 7:11am / United States / Love
Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML
by Anonymous / 04/20/2009 at 1:55pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, I learned I made the dean's honor list for my college for the first time since attending. I asked my dad if he was proud of me, to which he replied, "when you're as successful as your brother, I'll be proud." My brother is a Chippendale's dancer. FML
by GracelandDave / 03/19/2009 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…