slimblack

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slimblack

17Fucked!

slimblackslimblack
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 17 April 2000 (16 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1826
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 36 posted

About slimblack : Hi there! My name is Amanda and I'm 16. I live in Michigan but my heart belongs in England. I'm an honors student who loves to read and write in her spare time. I play 8 different instruments and I LOVE to sing. I'm a huge geek when it comes to bands. I'm a huge fan of 5 Seconds of Summer and One Direction. I have 16 cats that I absolutely adore and I'm proud of that. Most of my friends and family call me a crazy cat lady! I'm a dork but I'm very accepting and inviting so feel free to chat with me any time! Thanks for taking time out of your life to read about me. :*

slimblack's page activity

Visits<b>razoray9</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 12:20pm<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 7:11am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 1:00am<b>coralrenee</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 10:33am<b>bigwell</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 6:32am<b>BonerFart</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 9:08pm<b>Infamous278</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 11:16am<b>Cacksonic</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 4:49pm<b>RaNdOmIzEd2017</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 10:54pm<b>morgganluke</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 9:58am<b>DrSirSexyLegs</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 3:20am<b>Alpot</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 9:06pm<b>DBpiano</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 2:50pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 1:24pm<b>zacharyd650</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 7:46am<b>minimanion</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 6:23pm<b>andres1419</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 3:47am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 8:20am

Fucked!<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 4:53am<b>DrSirSexyLegs</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 9:21am<b>Alpot</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 3:06am<b>zacharyd650</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 1:46pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 2:12am<b>Michaelaarnett</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 9:24am<b>will_5801</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 4:28am<b>Matthew3689</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 12:45am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 6:00pm<b>ffej528</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 6:30am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 3:44pm<b>thatsawkward7</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 3:49am<b>robertd73</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 6:42am<b>DiJsLifeStyle</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 2:57am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 4:33am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 8:15pm

slimblack's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of slimblack's badges

slimblack's favorite FMLs

Today, my butt decided to delete the 650 photos I had on my phone. FML

by Anonymous / 08/28/2014 at 10:48pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

by KristaAaronn / 08/27/2014 at 8:24am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

by embarrassed / 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

by you ripped them off ages ago / 08/17/2014 at 2:15am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Kids

Today, it's my birthday. When I asked my mom if we were gonna do anything special for my birthday. She said, "don't lie to me. It's not your birthday." FML

by bad birthdays / 08/16/2014 at 1:09am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm / New Zealand / Kids

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my cat tried to jump up to the window, and missed. This would have been hilarious if I had not been sleeping under that same window, and then caught him with my face. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2014 at 1:28pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I hugged my dad. Since I don't hug him very much, he was confused. When I pulled away from him, smiling, he slapped me, saying the smiling and the hug made it look like I was "up to something." FML

by teentee401 / 07/07/2014 at 1:04pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up to an old lady right outside my open window, saying "Hello in there! Are you sleepy?" I was so startled that I answered her. She screamed. Turns out she's my neighbour's elderly mother, didn't know I was in there, and was talking to my cat. FML

by ADanceWithDavos / 07/07/2014 at 11:59am / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, as I was putting on sports shoes to get to a job interview in a hurry, a man ran past me and grabbed my formal shoes while shouting, "Ninja!" Try explaining to the guy at the interview why I was wearing sneakers with a skirt suit. FML

by Baskets-Tailleur / 07/07/2014 at 2:58am / France / Love

Today, I got called a cunt at work by a customer. What could I have said that could have caused them to say that? "Have a great day." FML

by notoneatall / 07/06/2014 at 11:39pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, my boyfriend said that he doesn't have to marry me because we coincidentally have the same last name. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2014 at 9:27pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I went to see the school counselor to schedule my classes for school. She asked me if I knew how to speak English. My parents are Chinese and I don't even know how to speak Chinese. I've lived in America my whole life. Plus, I even spoke to her in English to ask about classes. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2014 at 9:27pm / Work

Today, I called my mother crying, telling her how my husband has apparently been cheating on me for months. To my surprise, she didn't interrupt me or cut me off the whole time. Only when she didn't respond, did I realize she'd hung up a half an hour ago. FML

by ILOVELEDZEPPELIN / 07/06/2014 at 4:27pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous