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slayerxx

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slayerxx

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1048
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About slayerxx : I enjoy anything fun or funny, the outdoors are where it's at. This site is fun for some quick laughs. Feel free to send me a message always dig chatting with people.

slayerxx's page activity

Visits<b>cmonger</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 6:29pm<b>coleface00</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 1:48am<b>Zenbon4ever</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 12:49pm<b>MBSC</b> - the 04/08/2013 at 3:35pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:22am<b>a_y_a_z_z</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 3:45pm<b>twilighter_644</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 2:16pm<b>Weil</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 2:07pm

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slayerxx's favorite FMLs

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

#21354315
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18770) - you deserved it (35632)

On 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm - misc - by SDCore (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I have spent so much time watching Scooby Doo with my son that I actually used the word "zoinks". FML

#21352876
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26503) - you deserved it (5296)

On 02/09/2015 at 6:07pm - kids - by brazo667 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at a football game with my boyfriend. I said my hands were getting cold, hoping he'd hold them. He replied, "Uh, they make pockets for a reason..." and physically showed me how to put my hands in my pockets. FML

#21280399
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33322) - you deserved it (6566)

On 10/18/2014 at 10:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML

Today, my wife yelled at me for being a bastard and not caring about her needs. I felt like an asshole and apologized for everything. It took me a few hours to realize I'd basically just apologized for unknowingly hanging the toilet paper the "wrong way" for her OCD. FML

#21279154
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33887) - you deserved it (4914)

On 10/16/2014 at 3:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, was the day I would turn my life around and start losing weight. I went outside for my first run and said, "I got this!" I confidently stepped forward, the first symbolic steps to my new life. In the anticipation, I forgot my porch had steps. I face-planted on my driveway. FML

#21271662
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36560) - you deserved it (7277)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:17pm - health - by PickYourselfUp (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

#21271608
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39944) - you deserved it (16420)

On 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got robbed. I just moved so I didn't have much in my new house. They did decide that my cat was valuable enough to steal. FML

#21271461
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43307) - you deserved it (2521)

On 10/05/2014 at 7:30pm - animals - by FML - United States (Texas)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43298) - you deserved it (8726)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a public place before confessing that I've been seeing another woman, to avoid a dramatic scene. After being rushed to the hospital with a concussion and broken nose, I think it's safe to say my plan didn't go very well. FML

#20873101
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19694) - you deserved it (99407)

On 09/08/2013 at 3:31pm - love - by verbaltodomestic (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML

#20872880
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49674) - you deserved it (3180)

On 09/08/2013 at 12:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Switzerland (Bern)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53016) - you deserved it (19231)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while working at Home Depot, I was asked to cut some wire. When I asked her how much, she said, "From my computer to the wall". After explaining for a while that I didn't know how far that is, she left. FML

Today, my entire gym class had to run the 1600 with our coach calling out finishing times. My finishing time was reported as "3 days short of a year." FML

#20867471
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39643) - you deserved it (6694)

On 09/04/2013 at 1:28pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (South Dakota)



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