Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

skyttlz

Offline (16 hours ago) | Search for a member

skyttlz

26Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 25 August 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14623
  • Number of comments : 837
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 52 posted

About skyttlz : Hi. My name is Abigail and I'm 20 years old. I'm working part time at Domino's (fast food pizza), looking for a new job because I've been there almost 2 years and it's not what I want to do for life.

I love FML, Pinterest and YouTube. For the most part I have quit Facebook after being addicted for several years. I felt like I could be spending my time doing better things, plus there's always annoying people who disagree with me and try to argue, and I felt I was addicted and spent too much time on that site.

skyttlz's page activity

Visits<b>Freakitten</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 3:59pm<b>therouni</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 4:14am<b>thatnakedguy</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 8:43am<b>leogachi</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 5:57am<b>tj4234</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 6:33am<b>dk1991</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 9:14am<b>Sangogames</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 12:38am<b>JessMac9000</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 1:15am<b>racquel1115</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 4:28pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 7:37am<b>jerry91</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 4:58am<b>jdmx325</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 4:49am<b>_ExcitedPotato_</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 12:43am<b>feetlvr</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 7:11pm<b>Furby94</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 5:34am<b>I_Bite</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 7:55pm<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 3:30pm<b>dylanhasemann13</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 1:34am

Fucked!<b>dk1991</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 3:14pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 1:37pm<b>patwo8</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 5:07am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 3:37pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 5:25am<b>Mukuro</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 7:29pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 1:20pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 5:17am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 3:44am<b>therouni</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 8:23am<b>ThatllDoDonkey</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 3:13am<b>brieee</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 1:50am<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 5:06pm<b>gavdarv</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 3:00pm<b>Chelserser</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 12:27am<b>lilcuz69</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 4:25am<b>allstarrider</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 12:54pm<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 9:03am

skyttlz's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of skyttlz's badges

skyttlz's favorite FMLs

Today, our dog jumped on the bed while my fiancé and I were having sex, and let out the most horrific fart. My fiancé, like a gentleman, held my nose closed while he continued banging me. FML

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

#20533607
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56191) - you deserved it (14713)

On 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by RedWaters - United States

Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML

#20518830
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27554) - you deserved it (45841)

On 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, during a silent breathing meditation at the Buddhist center, I accidentally let one rip which echoed through the meditation chamber. If that wasn't bad enough, the follow-up odor was enough to fell a charging rhinoceros. FML

#20517185
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27133) - you deserved it (7666)

On 02/22/2013 at 2:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to take my fiancé to the hospital so they could remove a tampon applicator that he claimed he somehow "fell onto". It was lodged up his nostril. I'm marrying this man in a week. FML

#20508531
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28529) - you deserved it (4845)

On 02/15/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Venezuela (Lara)

Today, I was given a wedgie by a complete stranger in a crowded bar. FML

#20492051
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28021) - you deserved it (2952)

On 02/03/2013 at 8:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

#20406748
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36269) - you deserved it (20263)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ayye_its_nikki - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that my manager and I have synchronized menstrual cycles. She gets extremely bitchy, and I get extremely vulnerable and emotional - she yells at me and I burst into tears. FML

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend with candles and a sexy outfit. When he came in, he insisted that we needed music to help set the mood. Thirty minutes later, he's still searching for a song. FML

#20054049
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29218) - you deserved it (2856)

On 09/02/2012 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by ImOverHere (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while watching the Olympics, my father found it completely necessary to make a farting sound every single time an athlete jumps or bends over. This will be a very long few weeks. FML

#19995451
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21360) - you deserved it (2187)

On 07/31/2012 at 10:49pm - misc - by joleezad5 - United States (Missouri)

Today, as I sat down for my flight, I realised that the passenger I had to sit next to for the next seven hours was wearing a necklace made from tampon packaging. FML

#19995117
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23664) - you deserved it (1866)

On 07/31/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by lotd - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I had to turn down an offer of what seemed like some sexy time with a cute girl because my intestines were bursting with an intense desire to unleash molten lava. I rushed home to squat down, only to let out a disappointingly small piece of crud and a tiny fart. FML

#19984638
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31166) - you deserved it (5527)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Jarman (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend got a new job. He'll be over the road for three weeks at a time, and home on the remaining week. Basically, I'll see him once a month. Guess which time of month it'll fall on. FML

Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML

#19928978
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36558) - you deserved it (3099)

On 07/12/2012 at 4:35pm - misc - by LetItRip - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: