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skyttlz

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skyttlz
  • Town/Country : Up In Space, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7385
  • Number of comments : 795
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 50 posted

About skyttlz : Howdy. I'm 19 and I love FML! I read them almost every day, and I especially love reading the comments. Other than that I'm just a typical 19 year old. I'm an introvert so I find enjoyment in just hanging out in my room and finding something to do in my room. "I rarely get bored alone, I often get bored in crowds." I work part time at a pizza place and eventually I would like to be a chiropractor or physical therapist.

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skyttlz's favorite FMLs

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

#221148
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61726) - you deserved it (3432)

On 03/05/2009 at 8:51pm - kids - by SadDad - United States (Florida)

Today, I was meeting my sister's fiancé. I went to an internet cafe before I went to her house for dinner with them. I was on a computer and there was this really attractive man next to me. I was flirting with him and we exchanged numbers. Turns out, he is my sister's fiancé. FML

#220247
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59206) - you deserved it (5558)

On 03/05/2009 at 7:39pm - love - by f*** (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, there was a story called "Looking Good" about fashion in school that ran in the local newspaper. On the front page of that section it featured a picture of my class. I was photoshopped out. FML

#218280
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59711) - you deserved it (4041)

On 03/05/2009 at 4:36pm - misc - by failout (man) - United States (California)

Today, an elderly gentleman walked into the UPS Store where I work asking to use the laminating machine. I explained to him that we keep it behind the counter and I would do it for him, whence he produced several graphic photos of him having it off with nasty looking women to be laminated. FML

#213977
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45364) - you deserved it (3512)

On 03/05/2009 at 12:14am - work - by UhhhUhhhRRRick (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told my friend I hadn't had a period in 5 months. She asked me if I was pregnant. When I asked her if I looked 5 months pregant, she replied by saying "is that supposed to be a trick question?" FML

#196534
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39123) - you deserved it (13500)

On 03/03/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by booyouwhoree (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I asked my girlfriend when she would give me a blowjob. She replied, "you know that won't happen, I'm a vegetarian." FML

#195442
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60306) - you deserved it (27239)

On 03/03/2009 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by Sal (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was sitting in traffic for about an hour. I've heard stories about people doing the dirty in their cars and I never do anything risky so I thought, why not, I'll be here a while, no one can see me: I'll masturbate. Midway through I hear a tap on my driver's window. Its a police officer. FML

#192974
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25408) - you deserved it (130634)

On 03/03/2009 at 1:29am - intimacy - by imanidiot (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in the bank with my seven year old daughter, when I saw an old high school friend of mine with his wife. I said hello, and he commented on how beautiful my little girl was. I thanked him, and as I turned away, I heard his wife say "I guess the father must be the good looking one." FML

#187755
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49277) - you deserved it (2012)

On 03/02/2009 at 7:36pm - misc - by lexibabe (woman) - United States

Today, I was driving at night and saw a small animal run across the road. I slammed on my brakes and got rear-ended. The animal turned out to be a plastic grocery bag. FML

#187356
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42000) - you deserved it (11549)

On 03/02/2009 at 7:09pm - misc - by himtopia19 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom had my girlfriend and I over. Out of the blue, she pulled out my grandmother's wedding ring and gave it to me saying I can now propose. My girlfriend started screaming and said yes. I have been seeing someone else for 3 months and was going to break up with my girlfriend tomorrow. FML

#172507
466 comments

I agree, your life sucks (97808) - you deserved it (244448)

On 03/01/2009 at 4:58pm - love - by MrCanoe (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boyfriend was coming over so I bought this sexy corset, some fishnets, stilettos and see-through thong. After my dad left I dressed up and a few minutes later the doorbell rang. I answered it, whip in hand. It was my dad. He forgot his keys. I'm grounded. FML

#170978
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40284) - you deserved it (132846)

On 03/01/2009 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by thissucks (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was just wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and um...stuff. FML

#168503
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77314) - you deserved it (12976)

On 03/01/2009 at 3:45am - health - by Monty (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML

#162461
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (146038) - you deserved it (12668)

On 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm - health - by TahRah (man) - United States (Virginia)



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