Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

skyqween

Search for a member

skyqween

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 7 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2821
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About skyqween : I'm in highschool, go to school a lot... Uh, lurk more than I post, yada yada

skyqween's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

skyqween's favorite FMLs

Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I started fixing my hair and unbuttoning a couple of buttons on my shirt, hoping the policeman would let me off with a warning. When he got to the car, he rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath. I saw him walk back to the cop car gagging. FML

#1316192
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11067) - you deserved it (77173)

On 04/25/2009 at 9:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was fired from my job of 5 years. I was let go because I couldn't take the company to 'the next level'. My now ex-boss asked me if I could process my severance check because he didn't know how. I had to write myself my last paycheck. FML

#1315849
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52750) - you deserved it (2380)

On 04/25/2009 at 9:31am - work - by feistychick (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was on a bus and a man was feeling up my butt. I was just about to step on his foot when the bus stopped and he slipped out. Only then did I realize he'd stolen my wallet. FML

#1315045
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45817) - you deserved it (14292)

On 04/25/2009 at 7:50am - money - by Nicked (woman) - Israel

Today, I was doing a fitness test. Though clumsy, I managed to spin around a bat then dash across a balance beam, run through some tires, and walk across a log floating in water. Pleased with my performance, I walked to the bathroom, tripped on my shoelace, and busted my head on the floor. FML

#1314307
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45586) - you deserved it (4977)

On 04/25/2009 at 5:09am - misc - by Clumsy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, was my graduation from a prestigious university. In two days I start working at a hot dog stand. FML

#1312643
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60562) - you deserved it (15732)

On 04/25/2009 at 2:39am - work - by CollegeGrad (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was looking at my recommendations on Amazon, which included several vibrators. Just a few days earlier I was looking at books on anger management. Amazon thinks I need to get laid. They're right. FML

#1297315
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60572) - you deserved it (8269)

On 04/24/2009 at 6:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom had big news. I've been trying to get her to quit smoking because of second hand smoke for 20 years. She learned today that second hand smoke severely affects animals as well. Her big news? She's quitting. She doesn't want to hurt the dog. FML

#1296374
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60606) - you deserved it (3243)

On 04/24/2009 at 6:23pm - health - by whatthehell (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to go to school. I was unbelievably tired, but I gathered the courage to go take my shower. I then took a long shower, cleaned up my room, got dressed, and ate breakfast. Going back to my room, I looked at the clock, which read 3:22 AM. FML

#1289647
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42714) - you deserved it (35383)

On 04/24/2009 at 1:53pm - misc - by vinniesuckmadack (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, as a respected artist I was running a workshop with a bunch of rowdy college kids. I was in the middle of demonstrating a painting technique when I accidentally washed my paintbrush in my coffee instead of my paint water. They waited until I then drank from it to burst out in hysterics. FML

#1284029
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41954) - you deserved it (14690)

On 04/24/2009 at 5:04am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I met a really cute guy at work. He asked for my number, and I wrote it down on a piece of paper. After looking at the paper, he crumpled it up, yelled "Do you think I'm stupid? I know the rejection hotline when I see it", and walked away. It was my real phone number. FML

#1283810
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63305) - you deserved it (3432)

On 04/24/2009 at 4:18am - love - by sad (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boss confessed to me that she doesn't know how to change the staples in the staplers at work, so she just switches them when they run out. We work at an office supply store. She makes six figures. I make $10 an hour. And she just got awarded a trip to Aruba for doing a "great job". FML

#1280200
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58018) - you deserved it (3000)

On 04/24/2009 at 12:36am - work - by Idiocracy (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, as I was sitting in my car in a mall parking lot an old couple got into their new van and backed right into me. The man got out and in broken english decided it was no big deal. He turned to leave and tried to pat my back, but smacked my ass instead. I was hit by a car, and spanked for it. FML

#1274514
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44747) - you deserved it (2876)

On 04/23/2009 at 10:12pm - misc - by pleasebackintomycaragain (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got dressed in what I thought was a really adorable outfit. I had a cute pink skirt on, a white tank top and silver strappy sandal heels. On my way to the mall a car pulls over and this guy asks me how much for three hours. FML

#1259995
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27855) - you deserved it (70380)

On 04/23/2009 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by gabormelchior (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I came home from a two-week overseas business trip. My wife was at work, but she came home for lunch. When she came in, she brushed right past me to hug and talk to her dog. When I mentioned it, she said, "But I haven't seen him all day!" FML

#1252087
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59159) - you deserved it (3735)

On 04/23/2009 at 10:09am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sent my boyfriend of three and a half years a text message spilling my heart out, saying I'll love him forever, and how much I appreciate him in my life, that I want to be the mother of his children, etc. His text back to me? "Are you drunk?!?" FML

#1251660
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27373) - you deserved it (63050)

On 04/23/2009 at 9:35am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: