Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

skyeyez9

Offline (yesterday at 12:21am) | Search for a member

skyeyez9

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13162
  • Number of comments : 4195
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About skyeyez9 : I like to go snowboarding, skiing, reading, swimming, hiking. Crocheting (amigurumi), recreational shooting, and play xbox
Gamer tag is Sparrow1978.

skyeyez9's page activity

Visits<b>Snugmybaby95</b> - 2 hours ago<b>jrod9327</b> - 11 hours ago<b>FallenBaphomet</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 5:55pm<b>Machified</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 1:52am<b>sisas</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 4:11am<b>annihil8or</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 12:46am<b>DeltaDragonxx</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 10:18pm<b>mind_geek</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 6:09pm<b>drayloon</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 2:37am<b>vincent123</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 11:00am<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 11:54pm<b>fmlgiraffe</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 12:20am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 4:59pm<b>stargazer091</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 1:16pm<b>akorpija</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 4:37pm<b>johnboy465</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 2:19pm<b>LordGrew</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 2:47am<b>mrbear235</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 7:38pm

Liked!<b>normal_shy_kid</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 1:02am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 6:39pm

skyeyez9's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of skyeyez9's badges

skyeyez9's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a swim meet. I asked my friend if he could be my wingman and help me get a date with a girl I really liked. I told him my plan, and as I finished and turned to go to her, I noticed her standing right there, listening in on the whole conversation. FML

#21055088
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41719) - you deserved it (12017)

On 02/09/2014 at 2:12am - love - by look before you speak - United States

Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon after I had explained to her how scared I was of the exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML

#21054343
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41778) - you deserved it (5696)

On 02/08/2014 at 12:13pm - misc - by so scared - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to ask the guy I like if he'll be my Valentine. I wrote the question on a piece of paper and passed it to him, trying to be cute. He read it, wrote his answer with a smile, and passed it back. It said, "Depends, do you swallow?" No, no I don't. FML

#21053668
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44067) - you deserved it (9463)

On 02/07/2014 at 7:18pm - love - by mariana (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

#21053382
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40411) - you deserved it (3268)

On 02/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Mayotte

Today, I had an upset stomach all day at work. When lunch break came, I rushed to the bathroom. Just as I turned into an unstoppable human whoopie cushion, a co-worker walked in. He heard the entire arse symphony, and just asked "What the fuck, dude?!" as he left. FML

#21045407
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41550) - you deserved it (4529)

On 01/30/2014 at 5:46pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML

#21043704
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42687) - you deserved it (10982)

On 01/29/2014 at 12:13am - love - by freed - United States (Ohio)

Today, school was out because of snow. My dad walked in my room and shouted "Why are you home?!" I told him why, and he replied, "Then get out the damn house and play in the snow." He tossed me out in nothing but my shorts. FML

#21037332
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37309) - you deserved it (4691)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

Today, after three weeks of fighting with my husband, I found out that he really didn't create an account on a website for cheaters and charge the bill to his credit card. Our daughter did it as a prank, and only confessed because our fighting was stressing her out. FML

#21031747
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48534) - you deserved it (5765)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my new calculus teacher taught everything using nothing but soccer terms and analogies, just so the resident idiot meatheads would understand. I didn't learn a thing. FML

#21030844
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39652) - you deserved it (4888)

On 01/17/2014 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, there was a forest fire in my town. I was still forced to go to school, as it was safer. A lot of people decided not to go, and we ended up doing nothing but watching the news reports. There, I got to see my house burning on live TV. FML

#21030359
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67587) - you deserved it (4141)

On 01/16/2014 at 10:42pm - misc - by Fire sucks. (man) - United States

Today, as if having to endure the noises of my parents having sex in the next room wasn't painful enough, my mom decided to shout, "Yeah! Like a horse!" I want to cry. FML

#21028949
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58460) - you deserved it (5184)

On 01/15/2014 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by DisturbedMan (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

#21025946
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53477) - you deserved it (32442)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML

#21024175
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45914) - you deserved it (5188)

On 01/11/2014 at 12:55am - love - by rollergirl13 - United States (Alaska)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46319) - you deserved it (8717)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: