skyeyez9

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Offline (the 09/24/2016 at 7:09pm)

skyeyez9

23Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 20483
  • Number of comments : 4275
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About skyeyez9 : I like to go snowboarding, skiing, reading, swimming, hiking. Crocheting (amigurumi), recreational shooting, and play xbox
Gamer tag is Sparrow1978.

skyeyez9's page activity

Visits<b>Franck045</b> - the 09/17/2016 at 12:53pm<b>Trainn</b> - the 09/16/2016 at 2:46am<b>rajnidevraj1996</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 12:42am<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 12:00am<b>TheGreastest</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 5:32pm<b>honeybee66</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 10:57pm<b>French_giirl</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 3:52pm<b>PtCaboose</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 10:30pm<b>CJ77</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 6:47pm<b>LashBackX</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 6:10pm<b>arsh_fz</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 1:38am<b>MalignantSpirit</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 8:34pm<b>justindrew14</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 1:40am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 11:34am<b>raven83</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 10:09am<b>BIONIC859</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 4:40pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 8:47pm<b>Sampe101</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 2:33pm

Fucked!<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 6:00am<b>TheGreastest</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 11:33pm<b>PtCaboose</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 4:30am<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 2:47am<b>LaurenBies152</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 5:41am<b>orios105</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 2:32am<b>HowlingFire</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 12:46am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 12:07am<b>Melanie_marii</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 10:07am<b>Chanti</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 2:16am<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 1:48am<b>WaltzingPhantom</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 4:48pm<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 5:43am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 8:50pm<b>minecraftguy333</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 3:04am<b>watermelon15</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 12:00am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 5:39am<b>mypineapple</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 8:03am

skyeyez9's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of skyeyez9's badges

skyeyez9's favorite FMLs

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, thanks to an efficient diet, I reached my target weight. Unfortunately, my chest has disappeared. My boyfriend suggested we have a funeral for my bras. FML

by BrefODM / 06/12/2014 at 11:15pm / United Kingdom / Health

Today, my two cats decided to have a brawl on top of me. I was just trying to get to sleep. Now I'm covered in scratches. FML

by jaquie0812 / 06/12/2014 at 12:37pm / United States (Texas) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I clogged the only toilet at work. Thinking I could escape and blame someone else, I opened the door, only to see a line of people waiting outside. FML

by deservedly / 06/09/2014 at 12:28pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend shrieking at the top of his lungs. I ran into the dining room where he was, to find him standing on the table screaming "Kill it!" while pointing at an unmoving spider the size of a Tic Tac on the wall. FML

by eightleggedtictac / 06/08/2014 at 11:10am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

by great 1st impression / 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I baked a strawberry cake and I didn't have any fresh strawberries for garnish, so I used a can of strawberry pie filling. My neighbors said it looked like the cake was taken from the dumpster behind an abortion clinic. FML

by sothishappened / 05/20/2014 at 5:54am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I baked a strawberry cake and I didn't have any fresh strawberries for garnish, so I used a can of strawberry pie filling. My neighbors said it looked like the cake was taken from the dumpster behind an abortion clinic. FML

by sothishappened / 05/20/2014 at 5:54am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML

by BekkyLove15 / 05/18/2014 at 8:12pm / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I called the cops on a couple who was fighting outside my window at 4am. They hid in the bushes when the cops came, came back out when they left, and started fighting again. FML

by frustrated / 05/17/2014 at 6:11am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, while at work, I asked an older customer how he was doing. He told me that he'd just lost his wife. I gave my condolences before he clarified that his wife was not dead, but was lost in Walmart. FML

by oh god. / 05/14/2014 at 7:16pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I farted so loudly I not only woke myself up, but my husband as well. He mistook my gas for someone trying to break in and insisted on checking the whole house. I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. FML

by gassymomma / 04/28/2014 at 12:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, after years of marriage and my lazy husband letting himself go, I can now finish a bottle of wine and still be sober. This means I've built immunity to the last thing that can make me want to have sex with him. FML

by Anonymous / 04/21/2014 at 11:00pm / United States / Intimacy