Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

skyeyez9

Search for a member

skyeyez9
  • Town/Country : South Dakota, US
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10506
  • Number of comments : 4051
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About skyeyez9 : I like to go snowboarding, skiing, reading, swimming, hiking. Crocheting (amigurumi), recreational shooting, and play xbox
Gamer tag is Sparrow1978.

skyeyez9's last visitors

Bafrinnpilar21Federgirlsleepypersonjgrahl

skyeyez9's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of skyeyez9's badges

skyeyez9's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a very crowded restaurant. Being really shy, I requested to sit in the corner, but instead they placed me in the center of the dinning area. I started to eat my food and got really spaced out. Suddenly I sneeze-farted and everyone turned to look at me. FML

#14008430
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24441) - you deserved it (6355)

On 11/28/2010 at 3:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was cashier at work. The line came to a stop, but there was still people there. I kept saying next, but no one moved. I finally looked over the counter where there was a lady who had been standing there the whole time. She was a midget. FML

#13684047
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33381) - you deserved it (12268)

On 11/02/2010 at 2:20am - work - by saraleerocha - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to get into it, the Tic-Tac suddenly shot down my throat. After a minute of coughing and gagging, it came back up... out my left nostril. FML

#13652209
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27011) - you deserved it (4245)

On 10/30/2010 at 5:28pm - health - by DeepTaccer (man) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were fighting in the car, I paused to take a bite of my burrito. Just at that moment, he slammed on the brakes, causing me to deepthroat my burrito. I threw up all over myself. He won the argument. FML

#13648057
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26082) - you deserved it (7558)

On 10/30/2010 at 9:40am - love - by serendipity1027 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother, my aunt, and my two sisters are all on their periods. I can't even brush my teeth in my own house without being treated like a criminal. FML

#13641509
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38789) - you deserved it (4369)

On 10/29/2010 at 8:10pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my dads cremated remains came in the mail. This is the first time, in my entire adult life, that he has visited me at my home. FML

#13512801
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31237) - you deserved it (2226)

On 10/19/2010 at 3:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was surfing the web for Halloween costumes, and found one labeled "Extreme Girl Nerd". With the wig, the glasses, and the buck-teeth, it looked exactly like me. FML

#13174458
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25083) - you deserved it (5866)

On 09/23/2010 at 8:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I took some friends out to the woods to show them a natural spring. I explained to them that the water bubbles up from under ground, and that it's clean and tasty. I bent down and drank a few hefty handfuls only to look up and see a dead raccoon floating near me. FML

#12911536
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17106) - you deserved it (15398)

On 09/05/2010 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my husband of 3 years, who I have a 1 year old daughter with, told me he wants a divorce, but who knows, maybe in the future we can "date." FML

#12495310
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33626) - you deserved it (2771)

On 08/13/2010 at 5:11am - love - by starley (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

#11389778
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15286) - you deserved it (44860)

On 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm - health - by fartwoman - United States (California)

Today, after staying at my boyfriend's house for the first time, I got in the shower. His bathroom door doesn't lock, so half way through my shower he walked in. Trying to be sexy, I pressed myself up against the glass, which turned out the be a door that opens outwards. I fell on the floor. FML

#10939026
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15929) - you deserved it (28104)

On 06/03/2010 at 4:54am - intimacy - by elevenharries (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, after staying at my boyfriend's house for the first time, I got in the shower. His bathroom door doesn't lock, so half way through my shower he walked in. Trying to be sexy, I pressed myself up against the glass, which turned out the be a door that opens outwards. I fell on the floor. FML

#10939026
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15929) - you deserved it (28104)

On 06/03/2010 at 4:54am - intimacy - by elevenharries (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, at a debate tournament based on domestic abuse, my partner yells out, "Has anyone considered that maybe the women DESERVED to be beaten?" FML

#9141842
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34951) - you deserved it (5524)

On 03/16/2010 at 8:46pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, we had our friends over for dinner, one of whom is a psychiatrist. After a few drinks, my drunk wife and the equally drunk psychiatrist began to analyze my various character flaws. FML

#7969441
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20123) - you deserved it (2324)

On 02/07/2010 at 10:37am - misc - by bystander (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling with the lights off. It was 1AM, and I'd just finished watching a scary movie, so I was a little paranoid. I was about to fall asleep, when an eerie light lit the room. I jumped, got tangled in the sheets, and hit my head against the bed frame. Where'd the light come from? Not a space ship. Not someone breaking in. It was my phone. FML

#7124695
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7228) - you deserved it (22489)

On 01/03/2010 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: