Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

skyeyez9

Offline (the 12/11/2014 at 3:05am) | Search for a member

skyeyez9

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13563
  • Number of comments : 4200
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About skyeyez9 : I like to go snowboarding, skiing, reading, swimming, hiking. Crocheting (amigurumi), recreational shooting, and play xbox
Gamer tag is Sparrow1978.

skyeyez9's page activity

Visits<b>mind_geek</b> - yesterday at 4:30pm<b>thedoerofgood</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 5:14pm<b>americanafrican</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 11:10am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 8:32pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:47pm<b>mypineapple</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 2:02am<b>oops6663</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 4:54pm<b>pyromaniac9</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 1:00pm<b>wsdarrah</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 10:00pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 7:20am<b>evilamoebaattack</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 2:17pm<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 11:47am<b>Snugmybaby95</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 5:10pm<b>jrod9327</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 8:28am<b>FallenBaphomet</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 5:55pm<b>Machified</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 1:52am<b>sisas</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 4:11am<b>annihil8or</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 12:46am

Liked!<b>mypineapple</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 8:03am<b>normal_shy_kid</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 1:02am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 6:39pm

skyeyez9's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of skyeyez9's badges

skyeyez9's favorite FMLs

Today, the doorbell rang. I saw my incredibly overbearing mum's car outside, so I stayed quiet and tried to sneak upstairs. As I crawled through the hallway, commando style, I realised the door blinds were still out for cleaning. If scowls could kill, I'd be roasting in Hell right now. FML

#20694934
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39254) - you deserved it (9737)

On 05/30/2013 at 8:40am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

#20690661
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55963) - you deserved it (32929)

On 05/28/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by Abrams52 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my grandma's chihuahua was run over while I was taking her for a walk. She later whispered to me, "It should have been you." FML

#20690610
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56800) - you deserved it (7308)

On 05/28/2013 at 1:05am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as I was lying on my bed with one of my arms hanging from the side, I felt something sniff my hand from underneath. I don't have any pets. FML

#20688489
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57395) - you deserved it (3948)

On 05/27/2013 at 12:05am - animals - by scared-straight - United States

Today, while at the movies, I had an uncomfortable amount of gas that I couldn't hold in any longer. I waited for a loud part in the movie to conceal it and took my chance. Problem was, the loud part ended abruptly. I didn't. FML

Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML

#20683275
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34888) - you deserved it (3277)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:06am - misc - by redneckfamily - United States (Washington)

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

#20680679
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56039) - you deserved it (4369)

On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate in the backseat of his car, when a police car pulled up behind us. My mom later told me that intimacy was fine, just not in a car. We were in the car because she told me that intimacy was fine, just not in her house. FML

#20677651
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50629) - you deserved it (11520)

On 05/21/2013 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by backseatbusted (woman) - United States

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

#20673456
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46633) - you deserved it (3578)

On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML

#20673360
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44374) - you deserved it (5957)

On 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I reconnected with my best friend from childhood, and after a tearful confession, found out that for most of my engagement to my husband, she was repeatedly connecting with his penis. FML

#20672990
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42304) - you deserved it (2821)

On 05/19/2013 at 1:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45474) - you deserved it (4825)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got a mosquito bite on my chest. Due to a severe allergic reaction it has swollen my left breast a cup size. The first thing my boyfriend said was, "Hey look! I can finally see one of them." FML

#20667435
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59144) - you deserved it (5793)

On 05/16/2013 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by Urgghh (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77372) - you deserved it (5292)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, my boyfriend woke me up the same way he always does, by pulling on my hair. Just to be playful, I pulled him down on top of me and kissed him. Turns out his brother thought it would be funny to wake people up the same way. FML

#20656960
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53817) - you deserved it (9054)

On 05/11/2013 at 7:04pm - love - by wrongguy - United States (North Carolina)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: