Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

skyeyez9

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

skyeyez9

4Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14133
  • Number of comments : 4215
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About skyeyez9 : I like to go snowboarding, skiing, reading, swimming, hiking. Crocheting (amigurumi), recreational shooting, and play xbox
Gamer tag is Sparrow1978.

skyeyez9's page activity

Visits<b>UH60</b> - 7 hours ago<b>goblue10871171</b> - 7 hours ago<b>martini47</b> - 12 hours ago<b>ICantBelieveItsN</b> - yesterday at 1:57am<b>xninix</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 12:22am<b>buonotomato</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 6:00pm<b>ThunderKunt</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 1:22am<b>Blake77</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 12:27pm<b>Brittin8or</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 9:51am<b>kiwifruitred</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 8:31am<b>Xquisite1</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 10:41pm<b>Btwiateurcat</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 9:21pm<b>takara98</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 8:06pm<b>jarlballin</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 3:42pm<b>What2D0</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 2:37pm<b>Roxy4102</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 9:43am<b>MnM0609</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 8:45am<b>3051628</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 7:56am

Liked!<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 5:39am<b>mypineapple</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 8:03am<b>normal_shy_kid</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 1:02am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 6:39pm

skyeyez9's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of skyeyez9's badges

skyeyez9's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that every single picture that I have ever sent to my boyfriend, his father has also received. Every. Single. One. FML

#21337935
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23102) - you deserved it (25494)

On 01/15/2015 at 10:43pm - love - by everysingleone - United States

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML

#21330185
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34237) - you deserved it (6127)

On 01/03/2015 at 7:23pm - love - by allgassedout (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my 7-year-old daughter really did lie about my husband's "other girlfriend" as revenge for being grounded, and that he never cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it. FML

#21327839
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23313) - you deserved it (42263)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:00pm - kids - by skanula414 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my mom and I went to exchange a massive stuffed animal, which was meant for my niece. I was carrying it when I saw a really hot guy looking at me funny. My mom snickered and told him that I never go anywhere without "George". FML

#21325643
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31076) - you deserved it (2876)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:52am - misc - by thanks a lot mom - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML

#21321894
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31823) - you deserved it (5608)

On 12/22/2014 at 3:05am - love - by ScottyB - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, immediately after being informed of the sketchy activities that take place in our store parking lot after dark, I'm handed an orange vest and told to go out there to retrieve carts. FML

#21321892
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26799) - you deserved it (2075)

On 12/22/2014 at 2:53am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for several moments stunned, still pooping. FML

#21308801
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32821) - you deserved it (4231)

On 11/30/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by pooplife - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML

#21302674
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31119) - you deserved it (2601)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:23am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

#21300031
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28376) - you deserved it (3335)

On 11/16/2014 at 4:44am - love - by tine - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I saw a long black hair coming out of the drain. Thinking it was my sister's, I called her in and pulled it out for her to see, only to realize I was actually pulling out a long brown roach by the antenna. FML

#21296899
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34192) - you deserved it (4388)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:56am - animals - by izzy46111 - United States (Arizona)

Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML

#21282365
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35708) - you deserved it (3136)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:42am - misc - by youngboob (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

#21281971
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36965) - you deserved it (11197)

On 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by John (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML

#21271220
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35631) - you deserved it (3033)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was home sick and playing with my dog. I suddenly felt the urge to throw up, so I sprinted to the bathroom. My dog thought this was an invitation to chase me and tackle me to the floor. FML

#21259489
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32942) - you deserved it (3209)

On 09/16/2014 at 2:46pm - animals - by furryfriend (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML

#21257417
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40396) - you deserved it (4416)

On 09/13/2014 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: