skitz

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skitz

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 5 July 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 35721
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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skitz's page activity

Visits<b>bakry</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 2:40pm<b>jacksavage33</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 4:03pm<b>Mean_Oreo2436</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 9:40pm<b>EyesofStone</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 3:26pm<b>Kjaerlighet</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 11:25pm<b>dakota133</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 7:39am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 1:58am<b>accidentalsheep</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 12:16am<b>EnigMind</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 9:13am<b>eatsteak</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 12:46pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 11:34am<b>lizzy9147</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 12:36pm<b>jvegahernandez</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 1:47am<b>123765</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 9:52pm<b>osr215</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 12:50am<b>Wrex</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 6:27pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 10:36am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 1:09am

Fucked!<b>EyesofStone</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 9:26pm<b>lizzy9147</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 6:36pm

skitz's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

skitz's favorite FMLs

Today, after masturbating in the shower, I heard my phone go off outside the bathroom. After my mom saw me get my phone to check my messages she said "I think you're addicted to that", to which I said "but it feels so good and every guy does it." She was talking about how I text people a lot. FML

by Jon / 06/07/2009 at 2:47am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

by paranoid / 06/06/2009 at 12:43am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

by LadyChristina25 / 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

by LadyChristina25 / 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my doctor to get the morning after pill. I explained to her that the condom broke and I was nervous. She simply asked me "when" so I replied "...towards the end". I didn't realize she was really asking what day this happened. FML

by embarrassed / 06/01/2009 at 4:11pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

by deucelututi / 05/31/2009 at 8:03am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had sex with a new guy. After we were done, he noticed my lighter on my nightstand and said "I've always wanted to try that!" He put the lighter by his butt and fart into it, producing a flame. After, when he left, I sat there, naked, mortified. FML

by FMLFMLFMLFML / 05/29/2009 at 1:52pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my wife and I watched a documentary film about a kid living with severe asthma. In one scene, the kid has a severe asthma attack, and is rushed to hospital. My wife started laughing hysterically at this and after apologising, goes "it's just he sounded exactly like you in bed." FML

by Weezylover / 05/26/2009 at 4:24am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

by untitledentity / 05/24/2009 at 12:03pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop: 763. I'm 24. FML

by Tootsy_Roll_Pop / 05/23/2009 at 12:15pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

by herve / 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm / Lebanon (Beyrouth) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

by herve / 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm / Lebanon (Beyrouth) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

by herve / 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm / Lebanon (Beyrouth) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

by herve / 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm / Lebanon (Beyrouth) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

by herve / 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm / Lebanon (Beyrouth) / Intimacy