skitsoloco

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Offline (the 07/24/2015 at 5:20am)

skitsoloco

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1136
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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skitsoloco's page activity

Visits<b>obey_nikki_</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 1:38am<b>jamematt</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 10:25pm<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 5:24am

skitsoloco's FML badges

Consolation prize

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skitsoloco's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my dad to please shave his awful beard, because I'm a laughing-stock at school for being picked up each day by a guy whose face looks like Bigfoot's ass. He agreed, and 10 minutes later was sporting a pedo-stache. It's going to be a long year. FML

by assholedad / 02/11/2015 at 4:00pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, hours after being turned down for sex, I woke up to my boyfriend sitting at the computer, jacking off to a picture of my deceased mom. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2015 at 6:51am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up with my penis taped inside a milk bottle. Yes, I'm as baffled as you are. FML

by Milked Richard / 02/05/2015 at 11:14pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2015 at 1:23pm / United States (Wyoming) / Love

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to give me a naked massage. She straddled my back and started rubbing, then she sneezed and peed on me. FML

by bootyislife / 02/02/2015 at 11:36pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, after I got home from a long day at work. I go inside my room and find a life-size cut out of Miley Cyrus. I don't know how it got here. I'm the only person with a key to my apartment. FML

by I'm screwed / 01/27/2015 at 6:46pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my mom blow-drying my grinning dad's pubes. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2015 at 9:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while trying some new kinky things with my boyfriend, he cried out, "Call me Jesus!" Yeah... I think we're done with that. FML

by BDSM4Jesus / 01/19/2015 at 11:42pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend when I began dozing off. I was then awoken by an explosive fart. It was me. FML

by Halcyon_Sancta / 01/19/2015 at 8:05am / United States (Nevada) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I lost a sewing needle in the carpet. No worries, my big toe found it. FML

by momac86 / 01/19/2015 at 1:34am / United States / Health

Today, a council worker showed up on my doorstep for the final pool installation inspection, which was scheduled 10 years ago. FML

by livingstonjamie / 01/13/2015 at 3:28am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally sent my teacher a picture of me in my boyfriend's boxers instead of my essay. FML

by kb / 01/10/2015 at 9:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a hornet's nest in the backyard, so I called my brother over to take a look. He said "Hmm, wonder how fast you can run." then hurled a rock at the nest and sprinted back to the house. I wasn't so fast. I now feel like someone's beaten me half to death with a cactus. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2014 at 9:43am / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, a customer came in with a laptop smashed beyond repair. She asked if we could recover her files, but thanks to my idiot boss' new store policy I had to ask her a bunch of questions, including if she had tried "turning it on and off". She stared at me, speechless, like I was a complete moron. FML

by anonix / 12/21/2014 at 2:08pm / Canada / Work

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to cum if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

by dating a moron / 12/14/2014 at 12:30pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy