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skiddymarker

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skiddymarker
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 138
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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skiddymarker's favorite FMLs

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44390) - you deserved it (6059)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, an American lady here in Ireland asked me if I was a Leprechaun. Thinking she was joking, and me being quite "vertically challenged," I decided to just say yes. She then grabbed me and made me endure photographs, cuddles and pats on the head from all her fellow tourists. FML

#21082683
187 comments

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

#21082455
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39042) - you deserved it (7054)

On 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm - kids - by ashamed father (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

Today, my students presented their projects on genetics to the rest of the class. One student told the class that salted and unsalted peanuts were an example of genetic variation. She was serious. FML

#21076929
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39905) - you deserved it (3961)

On 03/03/2014 at 2:58pm - work - by Biologyfacepalm (woman) - United States

Today, and for the past 38 weeks of my pregnancy, my husband decided to amuse himself by following me around, making whale noises. FML

#21074731
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46274) - you deserved it (4822)

On 03/01/2014 at 5:42am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my mom told me all about how I was conceived in a Disney Land toilet. FML

#21070288
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39676) - you deserved it (3454)

On 02/24/2014 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Dudley)

Today, I found out that my mom isn't coming to see me for Christmas. Instead she'll be spending it in jail for a DUI and battery. Thank you to my cocklick of an aunt for taking a recovering alcoholic to a bar and pressuring her into relapse. FML

#21003791
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42176) - you deserved it (2481)

On 12/24/2013 at 3:48pm - misc - by jhulich (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

#20952633
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34124) - you deserved it (2905)

On 11/10/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by fuck you, bitchcake (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43542) - you deserved it (4600)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, while despairing over having been rejected for my dream job, I received an email asking me to come back in for another interview. Then they called me to say they accidentally sent the email to all the applicants, and that they definitely aren't interested. FML

#20915163
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39100) - you deserved it (2344)

On 10/10/2013 at 1:59pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I walked into a really fancy hotel bathroom. I spoke to the attendant and gave her my purse and coat while I used the toilet. When I came out, she was gone. The receptionist informed me they didn't have a bathroom attendant. FML

#20905582
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22648) - you deserved it (45056)

On 10/03/2013 at 1:41am - money - by wellcrap - United States (Texas)

Today, I spent a large portion of the afternoon playing hide and seek with the door-to-door salesman who saw me sneak in the back door and won't stop knocking. No amount of hiding behind the couch will make him go away. FML

#20867080
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34429) - you deserved it (6482)

On 09/04/2013 at 1:25am - misc - by my back hurts - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I received a text saying, "I don't think we should be friends anymore. You're terribly depressing and you make everyone unhappy" followed by, "Oops, wrong person!" and then by, "Sorry, it really is for you". FML

#20839682
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40389) - you deserved it (4100)

On 08/16/2013 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my 18-year-old daughter texted me and told me that she got in a car crash. She texted, "I forgot wich way wus left lol" and then quickly added "yolo right? Lol". FML

#20814697
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53834) - you deserved it (8959)

On 08/01/2013 at 2:21am - kids - by father of the year - United States



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