Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

skiddymarker

Online | Search for a member

skiddymarker

43Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 10 January 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3100
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About skiddymarker : Just an average grad student, modeling on the side ...

skiddymarker's page activity

Visits<b>bridgetb77</b> - one hour ago<b>Rainb0wdash9</b> - one hour ago<b>arasx0</b> - 19 hours ago<b>CitricAcid</b> - yesterday at 9:14pm<b>akvhalva</b> - yesterday at 6:58pm<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - yesterday at 2:35pm<b>RAH94</b> - yesterday at 1:48pm<b>missa8604</b> - yesterday at 10:32am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 8:39pm<b>mojopin</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 5:14pm<b>Toutejulie</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 2:28pm<b>erichanoki</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 8:18am<b>Fwibblwfwabble</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 11:35pm<b>TheBeast26</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 10:21pm<b>sunnyskys</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 8:11pm<b>UserOfTheMind</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 7:26pm<b>dragonballz57</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 6:44pm<b>GottaLove1D</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 6:20pm

Liked!<b>bridgetb77</b> - just now<b>dakatabg</b> - yesterday at 2:39am<b>curlytop101</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 10:16pm<b>CinematicKid</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 5:52am<b>RayvenWhite</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 10:26pm<b>srinathmatti</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 8:08am<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 9:18am<b>marctdiaz</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 8:57am<b>dishajain634</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 4:42am<b>feckmelife</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 2:46pm<b>Caitastrophic</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 8:30pm<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 5:15am<b>bufay</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 4:21am<b>vikky538</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 11:09pm<b>BananaSantos</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 5:55am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 11:33am<b>misj_01</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 6:36am<b>romanocheese</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 8:19am

skiddymarker's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of skiddymarker's badges

skiddymarker's favorite FMLs

Today, I sharted during my wedding vows. FML

#21365151
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11772) - you deserved it (1356)

On 02/28/2015 at 9:16am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, my girlfriend said she was going to start appreciating the little things in life. She's starting with my penis. FML

#21364983
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16064) - you deserved it (2196)

On 02/28/2015 at 12:03am - intimacy - by FreshDonuts (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my friend was confiding all her problems to me over Skype. I pressed the mute button so I could let out a fart, forgetting I'd already muted it earlier. I broke several minutes of my own silence with a devastating wet one. Now she won't talk to me. FML

#21364034
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22927) - you deserved it (10168)

On 02/26/2015 at 4:17pm - misc - by MuteNToot (man) -

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

#21360688
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32494) - you deserved it (7773)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm - misc - by wife - United States (California)

Today, a guy attacked me and tried to steal my bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to my husband screaming in pain. FML

#21360466
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31785) - you deserved it (3855)

On 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm - misc - by poncho55 (woman) -

Today, I found out the hard way that blood-filled deer ticks can look a lot like black jelly beans. FML

#21360309
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29029) - you deserved it (7427)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend got her wisdom teeth removed. I really want to help her out while she recovers, but her swollen cheeks combined with her natural buck teeth keep making me crack up every time I see her. I can't help it and I'm now in the doghouse. FML

#21360286
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21136) - you deserved it (26817)

On 02/21/2015 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML

#21360123
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27212) - you deserved it (3703)

On 02/20/2015 at 11:25pm - animals - by tulisa (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I noticed our weekly biohazardous waste pickup didn't occur as usual at the surgery center where I work. After calling, the company informed me they were short staffed and couldn't make it out 'til next week. Guess that amputated finger is just going to marinate another week. FML

Today, while working at my salon, I was cutting an older gentleman's hair. When he got up to leave, everyone noticed he had clearly pissed his pants. I felt bad for him until he laughed and said, "Here's your tip, have fun cleaning that up." FML

#21358633
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31102) - you deserved it (2056)

On 02/18/2015 at 2:48pm - work - by breyn (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to blackmail my douchebag boss for a raise, since I had ample proof that he's screwing a co-worker. Turns out he and his wife are in an open relationship, and HR doesn't give a damn about office romances. Now I have to quit or deal with the most hostile work environment ever. FML

#21358578
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13474) - you deserved it (55998)

On 02/18/2015 at 1:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend wasn't really bedridden sick on Valentine's Day. A Super Smash Bros game date with his friends was just more important. FML

#21358314
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28025) - you deserved it (4813)

On 02/17/2015 at 10:40pm - love - by superscript - United States (Washington)

Today, I've been freezing in my office for days at work. When I finally complained about it to a coworker, she led me into my office, said, "Let me show you something," then pointed out the thermostat I'd never noticed was even there and turned it up with a pitying look. FML

#21358000
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17595) - you deserved it (23057)

On 02/17/2015 at 12:42pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: