About skehar : Hey there, strangers. In the off chance that you've come to my profile, there's nothing to see here. Move along!
skehar's FML badges
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skehar's favorite FMLs
Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN", flips me over, grabs his clothes, and runs out of my room. FML
by soooyeah / 04/30/2009 at 8:15am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, I was driving home from school, when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. After my offer, I was rejected as she said "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway... MY driveway. FML
by Kelavmeister / 04/16/2009 at 9:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by Dude / 04/02/2009 at 1:36am / United States (California) / Work
Today, me and my friend decided to spy on my crush. He lives across the street, so we climbed on the roof of my house and watched him with binoculars. He was working out, and after 5 minutes he started writing something. He put a piece of paper against the window and it said, 'Stop watching me.' FML
by Creep / 03/27/2009 at 8:24pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML
by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friends and me had a little water balloon fight and somehow it led to throwing water balloons at cars. We all decided to hit a car all at once, after one came by we all hit it. The car stopped and started flashing bright blue lights. We ended up hitting an off-duty police car. FML
by AzNFoo / 03/26/2009 at 1:20am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I fell asleep in class during a boring economics lecture. I heard a whisper say "Rise and shine sleeping beauty." I thought it was my boyfriend, so i responded "Baby, what time is it? When is this F*ing class going to be over!?" it wasnt my boyfriend talking, it was my teacher. FML
by Noname / 03/18/2009 at 11:48am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, all of my friends and teachers asked me what was wrong because I looked sad and tired. One kid even said that I looked like "an abused housewife the day after." I was fine. It was the first time I went to school without wearing any makeup. FML
by bu09 / 03/07/2009 at 3:34pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, after class, my teacher pulled me aside and said "You know, I never received the e-mail regarding your disabilities that your parents mentioned. Could you have them resend it?" What disabilities? FML
by Jedi / 02/20/2009 at 1:16am / United States (California) / Work
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, my new doctor gave me a pamphlet for a cervical cancer prevention injection and told me it's… Today, my birth mother, yet again, tried to get in contact with me, even though I made it plain I… Today, after tossing and turning for hours trying to sleep, I finally doze off. I am then awoken by…
- Today, I’m a student in China, and I attended a welcoming party for the new students. It consisted… Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, a piece of candy thrown from the top of the Eiffel Tower broke one the frames of my glasses.…