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Today, my grandma walked into my room and asked if the thing lying on my nightstand was a computer. I said ''Grandma, that's a clock.'' After staring at me, confused for a few seconds, she then farted, and left my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34502) - you deserved it (4376)
On 11/23/2010 at 12:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, a woman got out of a car to scream at me as I was walking with the kids I babysit, demanding to know where I was taking her children. Apparently the woman who pays me is also a babysitter, who I have been "covering" for on her party nights. The mother doesn't believe I didn't know this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26824) - you deserved it (1736)
On 10/23/2010 at 8:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was woken up at 3:00 am to the sound of a tape recording of a baby crying, loudly. This has been going on for 3 nights, non stop. Why? because I brought up the subject of having a baby with my wife. Clearly, you can see where she stands. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27784) - you deserved it (8841)
On 08/01/2010 at 4:45am - kids - by kfoehslfns - United States (Oregon)
Today, I came home to find my room completely torn apart. My mom and dad start yelling at me asking me why I am doing drugs because she found a tiny baggie on the floor. It was the little bag that spare buttons come in when you buy a dress shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24909) - you deserved it (1339)
On 12/18/2009 at 1:52am - misc - by Theo (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I recieved a message on MySpace from a cute guy I've been talking to for a while. It read, "I saw a girl in Old Navy at the mall last night that looked a lot like you, but she was much fatter." I was in Old Navy at the mall last night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26121) - you deserved it (4768)
On 10/29/2009 at 1:28pm - misc - by girlthatstoofat (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had to cover for my coworker who didn't turn up for work. He is always late for work and I was pissed off about having to cover for him again so I said to my colleagues "He better be either in hospital or dead." Turns out he was dead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32757) - you deserved it (9723)
On 09/21/2009 at 10:06pm - work - by mcdeez (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Everything was going great until I noticed a small blinking light on my shelf. It turns out that it was a camera. My mom put it there to make sure I cleaned my room. She saw the whole thing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54634) - you deserved it (7477)
On 06/25/2009 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my husband and I decided to get a little frisky in bed. After we were done we lay spent on our bed then only to hear weird noises coming from our doorway. To our surprise not only had our daughter taken her first steps but has been watching and now making the noises as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43660) - you deserved it (22198)
On 06/09/2009 at 11:36am - intimacy - by PreciousIve - United States (New York)
Today, I was visiting my sick grandmother in the hospital when my cousin and I were playing in some empty wheelchairs. After goofing off I said, "They're fun, but I would kill myself if I was in a wheelchair." A little boy rounded the corner and said, "Tell me about it." He was in a wheelchair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8157) - you deserved it (56284)
On 05/21/2009 at 5:48am - misc - by boyo (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I got laid off from work. I was being escorted to the elevator when another coworker stepped inside. He said, "How goes it?". I said, "It goes". Then he said, "At least we have a job". FML
I agree, your life sucks (58162) - you deserved it (2390)
On 04/02/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by Dude - United States (California)
Today, me and my friend decided to spy on my crush. He lives across the street, so we climbed on the roof of my house and watched him with binoculars. He was working out, and after 5 minutes he started writing something. He put a piece of paper against the window and it said, 'Stop watching me.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (9975) - you deserved it (113791)
On 03/27/2009 at 8:24pm - misc - by Creep (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I fell asleep in class during a boring economics lecture. I heard a whisper say "Rise and shine sleeping beauty." I thought it was my boyfriend, so i responded "Baby, what time is it? When is this F*ing class going to be over!?" it wasnt my boyfriend talking, it was my teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11104) - you deserved it (61582)
On 03/18/2009 at 11:48am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, all of my friends and teachers asked me what was wrong because I looked sad and tired. One kid even said that I looked like "an abused housewife the day after." I was fine. It was the first time I went to school without wearing any makeup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48007) - you deserved it (7166)
On 03/07/2009 at 3:34pm - misc - by bu09 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, after class, my teacher pulled me aside and said "You know, I never received the e-mail regarding your disabilities that your parents mentioned. Could you have them resend it?" What disabilities? FML
I agree, your life sucks (41814) - you deserved it (1890)
On 02/20/2009 at 1:16am - work - by Jedi (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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