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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 June 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 36921
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About skatingweasel :

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skatingweasel's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting at home when I remembered that I desperately needed gas for my car. On my way there, I prayed that my car would make it the whole way, and was thankful when I pulled up to the pump, because I knew my car wouldn't go any further. Then I realized I left my wallet at my house. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48153) - you deserved it (25710)

On 03/24/2009 at 8:11pm - misc - by casey (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, at the dinner table my parents were talking to my younger sister about her new boyfriend and how they should be taking it slow. My sister then pointed out that that's not what I do. My dad said, "Believe me I know- your sister's easier to get into than community college." FML


I agree, your life sucks (70957) - you deserved it (29186)

On 03/13/2009 at 4:54pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML


I agree, your life sucks (146742) - you deserved it (22136)

On 03/12/2009 at 6:08pm - animals - by Noname (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one smallest penis I have ever seen." FML


I agree, your life sucks (72856) - you deserved it (9287)

On 03/11/2009 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my cat got into the bathroom while I was changing my tampon. As I was throwing the applicator away, I felt a sharp pain around my vagina; I looked down to find him swatting at the tampon string. FML

Today, as a bartender was carding my friends, I excitedly asked if he was going to card me. The guy gave me a blank stare before finally replying, "Look, lady, I don't have time to stroke some middle-aged woman's ego." I asked because it was my birthday. I just turned twenty-one. FML


I agree, your life sucks (87914) - you deserved it (6916)

On 03/10/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by rebecca (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, I was having birthday dinner with my girlfriend and her parents, when her Dad asked what I got her she replied "He said he was going to give me a Pearl Necklace when we get home." I realized then that my girlfriend did not know what I meant by 'Pearl Necklace.' FML


I agree, your life sucks (27159) - you deserved it (92758)

On 03/09/2009 at 9:35am - intimacy - by Ethan (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML


I agree, your life sucks (88029) - you deserved it (21994)

On 02/24/2009 at 6:32pm - intimacy - by Menareidiots (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was eating at a restaurant with my boyfriend, he is 6'2 and i am 4'11. Out of nowhere, the hostess started openly flirting with him, and asked him if he needed a booster chair for his daughter. FML


I agree, your life sucks (78500) - you deserved it (4887)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by not-so-young-shortie (woman) - United States (Indiana)

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