Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sk8_king

Offline (55 minutes ago) | Search for a member

sk8_king

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 560
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About sk8_king : love playing football, xbox, and listening to music. I'm a pretty simple guy. also on a side note I hate grammar nazis. this is FML not freakin english class

sk8_king's page activity

Visits<b>SuperCaroline131</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 3:13pm<b>ashleylove0525</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 10:16pm<b>summer135790</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 12:56am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 6:38am<b>sammy1021</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 2:33am<b>BeccaDoll0215</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 6:41pm<b>Aero_x</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 3:12pm<b>Lindsey_Marie</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 12:52am<b>ironfey</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 10:32am<b>rabbit987654324</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 11:28am<b>IceWrath</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 4:33pm<b>atl904</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 10:45pm<b>Capn_Keeky</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 5:35am<b>TaintChapstick</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 7:06pm<b>Wolf1998</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 10:32pm<b>notsoimportant</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 4:52pm<b>AntiPrude</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 9:00pm<b>TLIBZ</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 10:26pm

Liked!<b>SuperCaroline131</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 9:13pm

sk8_king's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of sk8_king's badges

sk8_king's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

#20911508
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41489) - you deserved it (3589)

On 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm - misc - by Agax (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband yelled from upstairs, "Babe! BABE, COME QUICK!" Terrified that something might have happened to our newborn daughter, I rushed up, only to find out he just wanted to show me that he'd learned how to spin a top on the tip of his penis without it falling. FML

#20908628
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48873) - you deserved it (6608)

On 10/05/2013 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by -____- (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46405) - you deserved it (3797)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I pretended to be deaf to a door to door salesman. He knew sign language. FML

#20907982
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21227) - you deserved it (47741)

On 10/05/2013 at 2:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, a customer was paying for his food. As he placed the money in my hand, he said, "Careful, those coins are sticky." I asked why. He replied, "You know, male stuff." FML

Today, I went to dinner with a guy I like and paid the $120 bill. After joking that he was an expensive date, he replied, "I laugh at how you think this is a date." FML

#20905656
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49856) - you deserved it (5748)

On 10/03/2013 at 4:14am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my friends and I spent a little too long enjoying a beautiful cliff overlooking the ocean. We spent the next 3 hours lost in a pitch black jungle with only one pocket-sized flashlight. FML

#20901708
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34200) - you deserved it (11449)

On 09/30/2013 at 7:18am - misc - by sothisishowidie - Guam

Today, a stranger pulled me out of the path of a speeding taxicab. He then took one look at my face, said, "I should've left you there", and walked away. FML

#20900063
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43271) - you deserved it (4095)

On 09/29/2013 at 1:45am - misc - by -__-" - United States (Washington)

Today, at work, a lady came in to have her glasses fixed. When she opened her case, an earwig crawled out. Instead of trying to kill it, she just left it and watched as it crawled over my desk and behind my computer. I later found the earwig in my hair. FML

#20899979
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40835) - you deserved it (4494)

On 09/29/2013 at 12:16am - work - by browngirl - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I texted a cute picture of my boyfriend and me to my mom, who lives very far away. She replied saying that my Photoshop skills are great, but that I don't need to go so far to pretend that anyone would date me, and that there's no shame in being single at 25. FML

#20899972
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43752) - you deserved it (2791)

On 09/29/2013 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner and have to leave in shame. FML

#20899471
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61451) - you deserved it (7217)

On 09/28/2013 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by :( (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

#20898181
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66742) - you deserved it (4060)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48718) - you deserved it (6371)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that an antidepressant that works too well is a stimulant. I've been jittering and twitching like a meth-head, and my co-workers are asking when Jesse will be showing up with my "stuff". FML

#20896646
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35109) - you deserved it (2955)

On 09/26/2013 at 9:50am - health - by CancerFdMyLife (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my one-night stand decided he wanted to meet my parents. FML

#20895300
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34604) - you deserved it (12332)

On 09/25/2013 at 2:59am - love - by so_screwed - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: