Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

sireen

Search for a member

sireen
  • Town/Country : carmel, usa
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 6 February 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 4729
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About sireen : hello(:
email; sireenz@ymail.com
aim; c0okiemonster708

sireen's last visitors

odod777tony411HeyHeyFishFilletNoDontKillMemaximus052312BrookieAnndixicup1324roundnproud

sireen's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

sireen's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized I can hold a pencil in my fat rolls. FML

#4923649
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13053) - you deserved it (44519)

On 08/30/2009 at 3:12am - health - by tomchuq (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins. FML

#4539697
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98147) - you deserved it (4140)

On 08/15/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by jellybean_94 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients came up to me and complained about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, called her out, and politely told her that she was not allowed in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year old boy. FML

#4478498
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45744) - you deserved it (6355)

On 08/12/2009 at 4:13pm - misc - by auslander (man) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, I started a new job as a maid. As I was cleaning the master bedroom's en-suite bathroom, the owners of the house came in and started making love. I was too scared to admit I was there, but after there was silence for a few minutes I thought it might be safe to leave. It wasn't. FML

#4472401
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43821) - you deserved it (5449)

On 08/12/2009 at 10:25am - misc - by maidmyday (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while working at my life guard job, I noticed a girl bouncing on one foot over to the pool. Afraid she would trip, I whistled at her and harshly yelled "NO running or messing around on the pool deck!" She removed her towel, revealing her legs. Or leg, she only had one. FML

#4406209
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40618) - you deserved it (14283)

On 08/09/2009 at 11:27am - kids - by ugh.. (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

#4158002
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49643) - you deserved it (13466)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was downtown with my boyfriend around Noon when we walked past a few guys who shouted out to me "You're the most beautiful girl we've seen all day". My boyfriend's response was "It's still early." FML

#4156114
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40675) - you deserved it (3401)

On 07/30/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by epicc1584 - United States (Maryland) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was running on a soccer field and accidentally dropped my gum from my mouth. No one had noticed so I picked it up and started chewing again. It was a different flavor. FML

#4151935
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5885) - you deserved it (59292)

On 07/30/2009 at 1:56am - misc - by FGum (man) - United States (New York) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML

#4070299
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45825) - you deserved it (11146)

On 07/27/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by fmysexlife (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, after 9 months in our relationship, my boyfriend and I lost our virginity to each other. We had incredible, mind-blowing sex. An hour later, he broke up with me because apparently "my orgasm face is ugly." FML

#4031400
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62042) - you deserved it (6755)

On 07/25/2009 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by misopower (woman) - China (Henan)

Today, I got myself a cool pair of colored contacts. I was wearing them while at home, so that I'll get used to them. Then I had to go to a job interview. I forgot to take them out. I went to a job interview with zebra-print eyes. FML

#3091991
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7279) - you deserved it (47212)

On 06/21/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by creepyeyes (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized how much I hate my apartment. Not only can I hear my creepy upstairs neighbor having sex with random hookers every few night, I can also hear him everytime he takes a shit. I honestly don't know which is worse. FML

#3085922
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45877) - you deserved it (1983)

On 06/21/2009 at 8:05am - intimacy - by Steph (woman) - Bulgaria (Grad Sofiya)



Allison Myres Perry & Jim Perry 's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Break that FML
  • Hello everybody! It's great to be back to present you with a new artist. Well, two artists actually. We don't often publish artists that work as a team, and today is all the more interesting because we're…

Wednesday 15 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: