Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

singingfreak525

Search for a member

singingfreak525
  • Town/Country : Annandale, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1331
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About singingfreak525 : Looking at my favorites I feel heartless. Most of them are favorited because they are funny, but some are because they broke my heart and I want to remember them.

singingfreak525's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of singingfreak525's badges

singingfreak525's favorite FMLs

Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML

#17423512
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26908) - you deserved it (3168)

On 08/09/2011 at 11:00pm - animals - by Nekro_Kat - United States (California)

Today, I was getting my picture taken. The woman taking it told me to smile, so I did, showing my teeth. She said, "Please, be serious about this." Slightly offended, I smiled with my mouth closed. She then said, "If you can't be serious, we won't do this." FML

#17413633
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28139) - you deserved it (2571)

On 08/09/2011 at 12:01am - misc - by wow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

#17349963
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46581) - you deserved it (2413)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:04am - misc - by soccerbuddyz - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML

#17338945
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48878) - you deserved it (9569)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by INside (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML

#17307885
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31161) - you deserved it (3256)

On 07/30/2011 at 10:07am - misc - by ewww - United States (New Jersey)

Today, someone had the unique opportunity to be able to say to me, "Excuse me, your pants are on fire." FML

#17270186
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23757) - you deserved it (4628)

On 07/26/2011 at 5:22pm - health - by smokin (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML

#17227905
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57002) - you deserved it (6812)

On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

#17207993
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42553) - you deserved it (4545)

On 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm - money - by iwantmoney - United States (Ohio)

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

#17188929
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39355) - you deserved it (3269)

On 07/20/2011 at 9:38am - misc - by therundown - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got a call from a man yelling and cursing at me, calling me a "selfish no-life asshole" for getting his "baby girl" pregnant. I'm 29 and she is 27 and we have been married for 3 years. FML

#17187115
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45473) - you deserved it (2684)

On 07/20/2011 at 3:40am - kids - by Harry - United States

Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML

#17182524
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30727) - you deserved it (6745)

On 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got a call from a creditor asking for a Sarah. I told them that I'm not Sarah, nor do I know one. They then asked if she was my wife. Annoyed, I said, "Alright, when did I get a wife? I don't even remember having a girlfriend." They sniggered and hung up. FML

#17175800
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20886) - you deserved it (5113)

On 07/19/2011 at 10:41am - misc - by Miriden - United States

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

#16993109
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28636) - you deserved it (2741)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, my mom took me to a counselor because of my addiction to watermelon. FML

#16990029
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29137) - you deserved it (5085)

On 07/05/2011 at 6:28pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to sift through hundreds of pages of legal documents. They were all written in Comic Sans font. FML

#16984657
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28402) - you deserved it (3063)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:04am - work - by chawlay (man) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: