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silve

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silve

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1410
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

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silve's favorite FMLs

Today, my son wanted to be Spiderman. He found the biggest spider he could outside and let it bite his hand. He's staying overnight in the hospital. FML

#21522558
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21719) - you deserved it (2058)

On 02/03/2016 at 9:04pm - kids - by Spooderman (woman) - United States

Today, I got to work and saw a new desk had been setup on stilts. 'Oh, who got the standing desk?' I asked. Turns out it's for the guy in the wheelchair who was right behind me. It needs to be high so the controls of his wheelchair can fit under the desk. FML

#21522017
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17694) - you deserved it (3388)

On 02/02/2016 at 5:06am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I found out why this crazy bitch slashed the tires of my car to prevent me from going to my exam. It's because I'm supposedly the curve setter for the class and she wants to get into medical school without me fucking it up for her. FML

#21515273
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23467) - you deserved it (1634)

On 01/14/2016 at 5:21pm - misc - by notmyfault - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had a job interview where I was asked, "Who is your best friend?" I replied truthfully, "My cat", only to then be asked what my cat would describe as my best qualities, which didn't go far beyond, "Remembering to feed him". They weren't impressed. FML

#21511573
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18293) - you deserved it (5078)

On 01/04/2016 at 10:08pm - work - by Emma (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my girlfriend let me stay over at her house for the first time. I went into her room only to find out she's obsessed with the Joker and has a bunch of posters and toys of him. I am deathly afraid of clowns. FML

#21509727
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22610) - you deserved it (3528)

On 12/31/2015 at 11:40am - love - by ScaredOfClowns (man) - United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove)

Today, while babysitting a young girl, I put on the movie Bambi, as she told me it was her favorite movie. I didn't know that her parents always skipped the scene where Bambi's mom dies. Despite my attempts to comfort her, she was still upset when her parents returned. Her mom blamed me. FML

#21509168
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21077) - you deserved it (1497)

On 12/29/2015 at 7:58pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I put my 5 month-old daughter in her swinging chair and walked into the kitchen to make her a bottle. When I came back, she was giggling because the dog was licking her face. It would have been cute, picture worthy even, if I actually had a dog. FML

#21507147
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22927) - you deserved it (1930)

On 12/24/2015 at 1:10am - animals - by lolmyfduplife -

Today, I was giving my friend a crash course in Star Wars over coffee. As I was telling him about the primitive and savage Sand People, some attention-seeking tit came out of nowhere and called me racist. Apparently she thought I was talking about people from the Middle East. FML

#21505182
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22358) - you deserved it (1940)

On 12/18/2015 at 2:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my friend took me tandem skydiving. When it was time to jump, he began crying, said he'd cut our parachute cords, then said "Goodbye, cruel world!" and pushed me off the plane with him strapped to my back. I pissed myself and cried like a bitch. He thinks his "prank" was hilarious. FML

#21500058
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26244) - you deserved it (2689)

On 12/04/2015 at 3:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm dad." FML

#21493785
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27745) - you deserved it (8727)

On 11/17/2015 at 9:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had the mother of a five year old come in for parent teacher conferences. When I told her that her son was very smart, but he often made up fantastical stories about his home life, she burst into tears. She then ran out of my office crying, "I knew it! I knew he was a sociopath!" FML

#21491960
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23935) - you deserved it (1589)

On 11/13/2015 at 2:06am - work - by nothowscienceworks - United States (California)

Today, a student set me on fire while I was lecturing my class about proper lab safety. FML

#21491253
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22737) - you deserved it (1976)

On 11/11/2015 at 12:47pm - work - by burnbabyburn - United Kingdom

Today, I had to grab a large kitchen knife from my son, after I heard him convince his friend to join him in cutting off his finger, so they could "be assassins like Ezio." FML

#21479950
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24985) - you deserved it (2861)

On 10/14/2015 at 10:29am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

 Today, while babysitting my nephew, I was looking through a bin of toys, and I saw a fake spider. I picked it up to do a prank with. It wasn't fake. FML

#21478450
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22193) - you deserved it (5370)

On 10/10/2015 at 11:30pm - misc - by Scarred4Life - United States (California)

Today, I found out my son told his teachers that I make his brother Tom sleep on the floor, make him stay out of the house for long periods of time, and don't let him use the toilet. Tom is actually our cat. FML

#21477463
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25158) - you deserved it (1765)

On 10/08/2015 at 7:53am - animals - by Bad Mother (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)



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Friday 5 February 2016

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