silon5

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Offline (the 04/22/2016 at 8:56pm)

silon5

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 August 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 854
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About silon5 : No Risk, No Fun

silon5's page activity

Visits<b>smiley1014</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:28pm<b>Elhadji1212</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 11:57am<b>usemyusername</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 11:23am<b>lucchini</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 11:18am<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 8:05am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 5:17pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 6:54am<b>justin1205</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 6:20pm<b>friedpwnadge</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 11:27am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 2:16am

silon5's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Perfectionist

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silon5's favorite FMLs

Today, I made an excuse and didn't turn up at work. Little did I know my boss did the same. We both bumped into each other at the shopping centre across town. FML

by AGB10 / 06/23/2014 at 2:11pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Work

Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2014 at 2:17pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, at work, a lady approached me asking if I'd found a used cloth diaper on a table, and I told her it was probably in the trash. She said "That's okay, I can wash it." So I searched through several bags of trash, and when I couldn't find it, she said "Oh never mind! It's in my bag." FML

by cootiequeen / 06/01/2014 at 12:13am / United States / Work

Today, it's been a week since I found an egg in the street that had seemingly fallen out of a nest. I'd bought a cage and an expensive incubator lamp to save it. It's thus been a week that I've been trying to save a mouldy old potato. FML

by mac cayne / 05/01/2014 at 11:13pm / France (Alsace) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

by ashamed father / 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML

by Jehovah God / 03/07/2014 at 1:51pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML

by fuck you, Odin, FUCK YOU / 03/03/2014 at 5:35pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

by well SHIT / 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I would like to thank the program designer that put "Set as home page" directly under "Remove from history". FML

by The_Rest_of_the_Story / 12/14/2013 at 1:38am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my bandmate and I decided to propose to our girlfriends, who are also in the band, at the same time in the middle of a concert. His girlfriend said yes. Mine ran off the stage crying. FML

by rock'n roller / 12/02/2013 at 10:42pm / Love

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

by wtfmama / 05/04/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, I realized I have been single for far too long when I was turning off porno after porno because I couldn't stand the horrible acting. FML

by the critic / 06/18/2012 at 6:22am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, if you live in California, you might have seen a crazy drunk guy naked in front of a McDonald's, waving at everyone. Yeah, that was probably me. FML

by smh / 05/13/2012 at 6:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while riding a roller coaster I got hit in the chest by a wasp going 80 miles per hour. As if that didn't hurt enough it somehow managed to survive and fell down my shirt. It crawled around and bit me a few times before the ride ended. FML

by jreed509 / 07/03/2011 at 1:25am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I was at the doctor's getting some skin scraped off the bottom of my foot for some tests. As soon as the doctor grabbed my foot, it tickled and I accidentally kicked him in the face. During this, the blade sliced my foot open. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2011 at 2:35am / Health