About silbot : I've been on FML for a while now, I made a new account because I couldn't get my old one's name changed. Anyways, I only comment when I feel like I have something I need to say.
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Today, I called my girlfriend and she answered telling me how amazing the sex was last night and she can't wait to see me later. I didn't see her last night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (82030) - you deserved it (3327)
On 02/20/2009 at 6:42pm - intimacy - by screewit (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was complaining to my sister about how jealous I was of her looks. Her response was "Sometimes it's okay to be the ugly sister. Like, you have less of a chance of getting raped." FML
I agree, your life sucks (44700) - you deserved it (4501)
On 02/12/2009 at 8:24pm - misc - by Duckie W (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I visited my 78 year old grandmother. She thanked me for visiting and gave me a magazine before I left telling me I might find something I like in there. When I got home I looked at the magazine only to realize it's full of dildos and sextoys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30218) - you deserved it (2149)
On 02/09/2009 at 2:51am - intimacy - by V (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was taking the elevator down with a group of people. It stopped on the 2nd floor and I said "What asshole can't take the steps from the 2nd floor?" Then a kid in a wheelchair got on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4497) - you deserved it (33056)
On 02/03/2009 at 3:30pm - misc - by j0natron (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with a girl from home who I'd wanted for a long time. She has low blood pressure problems though, and when things got hot, she passed out while she was on top of me, fell and hit her head on the night stand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37948) - you deserved it (2510)
On 02/03/2009 at 2:58pm - intimacy - by BRELLA (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I woke up with the worst hangover of my life. My best friend comes over and informs me that I had sex with my girlfriend's two best friends last night. Awesome! Then I realized her best friends are guys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7163) - you deserved it (14965)
On 01/31/2009 at 9:43am - intimacy - by Ah hell - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was at work, the Disney Store. A little boy was crying so I went over to him. After talking to him for a little while I found out he couldn't find his mother. When he became comfortable I went to help him stand up, he choked back his tears and then puked all over me from the waist down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15754) - you deserved it (1069)
On 01/27/2009 at 3:02pm - work - by Ren - United States (Illinois)
Today, I decided to get a Blizzard from Dairy Queen. As bent down to put my pen away, my Blizzard somehow defied the laws of gravity and fell on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10374) - you deserved it (2519)
On 01/22/2009 at 6:10am - love - by sadtimes - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)
Today, I went to the bathroom and didn't realize my skirt was tucked in my ugliest underwear until I reached the elevator. Thanks for not telling me girl-in-the-yellow-shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11099) - you deserved it (2704)
On 01/21/2009 at 12:56pm - misc - by Ella - United States (California)
Today, I sliced my arm open on the weekend, patched it with a fabric bandaid. Had an allergic reaction to the bandaid, arm now swollen, blistering and keeping-me-awake itchy. Pharmacist's advice? "Oooh, that looks bad. Better put a bandaid on that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18193) - you deserved it (1478)
On 01/20/2009 at 8:08pm - health - by sore - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I threw a rock in the air and watched it soar. And watched it come back down and hit me in the face. Gravity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4116) - you deserved it (36740)
On 01/13/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Gale - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I sat in the train and the old lady sitting next to me stares at my face. I ask her if she is ok and she starts yelling "Willy! It's you! Where have you been all this time?". The entire train trip went like this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13312) - you deserved it (955)
On 12/25/2008 at 5:30am - misc - by LDF - Sent from mobile version
Today, I said thanks to a man who got up for me in the bus. He angrily said "no, not you!". The old lady who sat down is now staring at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12033) - you deserved it (4601)
On 12/03/2008 at 12:04am - misc - by pam - Sent from mobile version
Today, during a lunch I said "It must be awful to realize that you've been cheated on!". One of the men present had just found out that he had been. I then try to correct my tactlessness by saying "The worst must be when your wife leaves you for another woman". Which was also the case. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16158) - you deserved it (6010)
On 11/27/2008 at 7:34am - misc - by lovely-sweet - Sent from mobile version
Today, I ate at a friend's house. Her 5-year-old son, who was at the table with us, looked at me and said quietly, "You're ugly." My friend told him off, causing him to cry, and shout, "But she isn't pretty!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (45403) - you deserved it (3924)
On 11/13/2008 at 11:16pm - kids - by mimo - Sent from mobile version
Monday 17 June 2013
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