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sickofnames
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  • Number of visits : 6052
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today, my husband of one week lost his wedding ring while we were preparing for a dinner party. After a thorough search and no luck, I started to cry. He told me to quit being a drama queen because we had guests. He then got drunk with his friends, puked on the patio, and called me a bitch. FML

#3302953
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59493) - you deserved it (8067)

On 06/28/2009 at 12:05pm - love - by honeymoonisover (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I had my first kiss standing in front of my front door. It was really cute, the way you normally think about first kisses. When I got inside, I realized my mom had been watching out her second story bedroom window taking pictures. She put them on Facebook captioned 'My baby's first kiss!' FML

#3302714
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86031) - you deserved it (5954)

On 06/28/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by steven (man) - Cayman Islands

Today, I was at the movies with my mom and dad, and the preview to my "My Sisters Keeper" came on. The trailer started out with "Most babies are accidents..." Right as that line was finished my mom elbowed me and laughed. FML

#3295379
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53614) - you deserved it (4078)

On 06/28/2009 at 2:12am - kids - by A2 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sitting at the park with a friend when a small child approached us. Just as moved off the bridge to let the kid play, he asked if I would like to play the troll under the bridge. I laughed and said no thanks, to which the kid responded 'but there is nobody else ugly enough.' FML

#3285415
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44396) - you deserved it (3643)

On 06/27/2009 at 9:00pm - kids - by failure (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, my attractive boss sat me down in the break room to say how much she appreciated how much work I've been doing despite being a temp. She was wearing a skirt, and I couldn't take my eyes off her legs. She then patted me on the leg and said "Good Talk". It wasn't my leg. FML

#3267231
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37263) - you deserved it (16110)

On 06/27/2009 at 3:03am - work - by EmployeeOfTheMonth (man) - United States (California)

Today, my friend told me that semen was inflammable. Later at night I jacked off into a sock and then, excitedly, tried to lit the sock on fire. Turns out, semen is very much not inflammable. Naked, I shook my sock in the air so it would extinguish while my semen splashed out all over my room. FML

#3262847
368 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7086) - you deserved it (106127)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by notinflammable (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I finally thought that my mother was okay with me being a lesbian. Then, over dinner, she turns to me and says "So, do you still think you like girls, or are you going to start being normal again?" FML

#3237223
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49968) - you deserved it (9721)

On 06/26/2009 at 10:22am - love - by shouldhaveknown (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a man from across the bar looked at me, pointed and said "MMMM, now THAT'S what I want." Offended, I confronted him to tell him I felt disrespected by him referring to me as 'that.' Turns out, he was pointing to the cheeseburger that the waitress behind me was holding. FML

#3207730
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7205) - you deserved it (45935)

On 06/25/2009 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found my long lost diary and curiously read it. What's worse than finding out that your mother read your diary? Finding out that your mother wrote comments in it. FML

#3205233
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58562) - you deserved it (3453)

On 06/25/2009 at 3:15pm - misc - by Emptyspace (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was awoken by my son squirting liquid on me from a bottle. We have a high deer population in our area, so I spray urine contained in black bottle on my plants to help deter the deer from eating them. I also water my flowers with water from a blue bottle. My son used the black one. FML

#3200106
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27266) - you deserved it (5765)

On 06/25/2009 at 6:17am - misc - by GoldenShower (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I am currently grounded for three weeks, have no car, cell phone, or television privileges, and am not allowed to spend more than 10 minutes on the computer a day. The reason why: I was seven minutes past my 9'oclock curfew. I'm 18. FML

#3180871
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74722) - you deserved it (11169)

On 06/24/2009 at 5:34pm - misc - by creeped_out_ - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was informed from a fellow employee at a bar that he finally "hit" the boss' wife. I work for my parents. FML

#3168193
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60945) - you deserved it (2255)

On 06/24/2009 at 5:59am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)



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