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shutupmichaela

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shutupmichaela

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 September 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 679
  • Number of comments : 85
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About shutupmichaela : sadly, no, I am not Hayley Williams from Paramore.

shutupmichaela's page activity

Visits<b>Laeffy</b> - 14 hours ago<b>BlueHairedPotato</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 3:49am<b>stelerfive1992</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 6:57pm<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:54am<b>Caucasianasian14</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 3:36am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 6:57pm<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 6:21pm<b>Saber74</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:57pm<b>kukumber</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 3:43pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 11:29am<b>thepurplewalrus</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 2:32am<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 6:21pm<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 9:32am<b>obviouslywaffles</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 6:21am<b>hotel135</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 4:40pm<b>hater4lizife</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 1:33pm<b>Spdt5561</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 9:37pm<b>nreed32</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 9:36pm

Fucked!<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 12:21am<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 9:03am<b>gary3768</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 3:28am

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shutupmichaela's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46145) - you deserved it (4883)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28418) - you deserved it (40819)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I like. We climbed a tree to watch the sunset, and as the sun went down, I kissed him. He fell out of the tree. FML

#20920034
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49823) - you deserved it (5669)

On 10/14/2013 at 12:02pm - love - by lovehurts - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I figured out my 1-year-old daughter likes to dip her hand in our dogs' water bowl, and rub the water on her face. So I put the water bowl out of reach. She then figured out how to open the bathroom door and use the toilet instead. FML

#20918462
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40558) - you deserved it (4150)

On 10/13/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by Water Daughter - United States

Today, I got my daughter's school pictures. Instead of smiling, she did the duck face. She's 6. FML

#20912722
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47951) - you deserved it (7842)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, the creepy kid on the bus saved me a seat again. Thinking he wanted to be friends, I followed him on twitter. He was doing a live video feed so I checked it out. It was of me. FML

Today, I decided to be friendly and say hi to the weird kid at school, who was sitting by himself eating lunch. After I said hello, he stared up at me intensely and said, "I don't have many friends. Yeah. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of them." FML

#20895757
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39049) - you deserved it (4997)

On 09/25/2013 at 4:02pm - misc - by scared shitless in ohio (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML

#20875790
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43940) - you deserved it (6410)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:44pm - misc - by Grand Slam (man) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

#20865525
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43788) - you deserved it (4832)

On 09/03/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out I was 13th in a graduating class of about 350 students. When I told my mother, without batting an eye, she told me, "Hey, shit floats". FML

#20859797
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40206) - you deserved it (2715)

On 08/30/2013 at 12:11am - work - by Parental Support - United States (Maryland)

Today, while at a concert, my boyfriend got mad and jealous because I kept looking at the singer instead of him. He still won't talk to me. FML

#20834941
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49581) - you deserved it (6239)

On 08/13/2013 at 2:58am - love - by really? - United States

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

#618909
382 comments

I agree, your life sucks (212073) - you deserved it (33845)

On 03/26/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by JAY22 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
516 comments

I agree, your life sucks (244523) - you deserved it (82521)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)



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