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shredder8838's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
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shredder8838's favorite FMLs
Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML
by Anonymous / 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, at work at a gas station kiosk, a man requested a carton of cigarettes. We keep our cigarettes on a high shelf. I'm short and very large chested so I have to jump in order to reach the carton. He said, "I only come here for the entertainment" and left without purchasing his cigarettes. FML
by aprilmay91 / 03/11/2012 at 8:38am / United States / Work
by asianlover / 06/30/2011 at 3:24am / Finland (Western Finland) / Miscellaneous
by UGH / 08/31/2009 at 7:48pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/30/2009 at 5:23am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, my first graders released the butterflies we've been raising. The kids were sad that one had died in his cocoon and wouldn't be set free. Turns out that butterfly may have had a better fate: a flock of birds ate half of the others. Immediately after releasing them. In front of the kids. FML
by Anonymous / 04/29/2009 at 12:30pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML
by SpiderMan / 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
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