Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

shortyshort21

Search for a member

shortyshort21
  • Town/Country : Atlanta
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2073
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

shortyshort21's last visitors

ireply_wlyricsnubbles10Rallred32jillytcthebestintheworljeffandjeffmangoboy1

shortyshort21's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

shortyshort21's favorite FMLs

Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML

#12792346
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33041) - you deserved it (22086)

On 08/28/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Sicko - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend asked me how big the Sun would be compared to the Earth. I didn't have anything on me to help demonstrate, so to imitate the Earth, I made a small hole with my index finger and thumb and said "Okay, imagine a ball this small." She then looked at my crotch. FML

#12769605
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21928) - you deserved it (10883)

On 08/27/2010 at 8:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my new girlfriend, with whom I have not had sex, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said "This one is my favorite" now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML

#12768681
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38692) - you deserved it (4239)

On 08/27/2010 at 5:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I had to use my butthole to negotiate with my husband so I can get a new tattoo. FML

#12753768
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12877) - you deserved it (45849)

On 08/26/2010 at 9:32am - intimacy - by H8TR (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I mentioned to my dad (we have a close relationship) that my last condom had expired. Happy to buy me new ones for the sake of safe sex, he asked me "Do you need small, or extra small?" FML

#12694516
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30048) - you deserved it (20369)

On 08/23/2010 at 1:05am - intimacy - by diesel444 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend of a year and I had sex for the first time in several weeks due to relationship problems; I came in less than 10 seconds. We're still having problems. FML

#12641347
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20040) - you deserved it (24784)

On 08/20/2010 at 5:51am - intimacy - by pathetic (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to record us having sex and me screaming his name. He set it as my ringtone without telling me. I had my phone volume on high as I was hanging out with my family. FML

#12612003
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28325) - you deserved it (7785)

On 08/18/2010 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by XxMe123xx - Sent from mobile version

Today, for my mom's birthday, we went camping. At night, my mom and her boyfriend decided to have "Birthday Sex" because they thought everyone was asleep. Trying to not make it awkward for me and my friend that I brought along, I kept still. Soon, I heard my friend going to town on herself. FML

#12552368
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42014) - you deserved it (4265)

On 08/16/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my best friend thought it would look cool if I recorded her swinging while lying under the swing. She ended up kicking me in the face and laughing so hard she pissed on me. FML

#12522582
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29135) - you deserved it (14252)

On 08/14/2010 at 4:43pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found a pile of animal skeletons scattered in my backyard. It appears that last night, mother nature decided to rain so hard, that the graves of my childhood pets floated back up to the top, and covered half of my field. I now have to pick all of it up before my dog sees them. FML

#12396014
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31009) - you deserved it (3218)

On 08/08/2010 at 7:27pm - animals - by L.Lime05 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my cat trying to mate with my favorite sweater. FML

#12226280
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23130) - you deserved it (6133)

On 07/31/2010 at 1:04pm - intimacy - by anon - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, my husband left for a two-week trip. Last night he gave the dog a treat of steak fat and gristle. My treat? I am on bed rest with my pregnancy and helpless to stop the rancid dog farts that are silent and smell like a burning septic tank exploded. FML

Today, my kids surprised me when I got home. One of them played the Rocky theme song on the stereo, and the other came up to me and said, "Daddy, let's go. We need you to drop about 15 pounds before you appear in front of all of our friends at our play." FML

#11980877
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25653) - you deserved it (7011)

On 07/19/2010 at 9:59am - kids - by Cody (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML

#11923673
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30234) - you deserved it (15998)

On 07/16/2010 at 3:45pm - misc - by liz - United States (California)

Today, after suggesting to my daughter for a while that she should try out for a cheerleading team to become more confident, she went to tryouts. She didn't make the team and she's spent the last six hours in her room crying. FML

#11541731
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11828) - you deserved it (31322)

On 06/29/2010 at 1:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: