shortpants

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shortpants

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 563
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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shortpants's page activity

Visits<b>Dreamer4094</b> - the 05/15/2013 at 1:38am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:27pm

shortpants's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

shortpants's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with this girl I met in stats class when my roommate walked in. He started applauding and said, "$20 bucks for me! I knew you weren't gay!" Him and my other roommate had a bet. They are my best friends. FML

by CBBP / 03/31/2009 at 11:35am / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my boyfriend of almost ten months who his top five women to have it off with would be. I was third. My mom was second. FML

by lucky / 03/30/2009 at 8:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I went to Walgreen's for a tub of Vaseline. The old guy at the counter looked at me, winked, and said, "Not having too much luck with the ladies, eh?" He was right. FML

by Anonymous / 03/29/2009 at 3:08pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my guy friend about prom. I told him I was turned down by 7 guys. So he said "Well, you could always ask me." I then said "Do you want to go to prom with me?" His response was "Nope...now that's 8!" FML

by rejected / 03/27/2009 at 8:38pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

by Alex / 03/26/2009 at 12:42am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my 11 year old brother walked in on me sitting on my boyfriend's ass and giving him a back massage. He tilted his head a little and then said "Aren't you guys doing it wrong? Isn't he supposed to be on top?" My boyfriend laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

by SLA / 03/23/2009 at 7:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy