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shockwave259

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shockwave259

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 November 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 572
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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shockwave259's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37872) - you deserved it (9626)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, after being with my boyfriend for seven years, he finally proposed. To another woman. FML

#12964178
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42061) - you deserved it (3649)

On 09/08/2010 at 3:46pm - love - by onthemarket (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I talked to my boyfriend's dad for the first time. One of the first things that he said to me was, "So, I hear you're a screamer." FML

#12832697
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36271) - you deserved it (6527)

On 08/31/2010 at 1:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was taking care of a friend's hamster. Thinking the hamster wanted to make a bed, I put some cotton balls in his cage so he would be comfy. He promptly ate them and died. FML

#12781273
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14398) - you deserved it (36258)

On 08/28/2010 at 12:56am - animals - by Kelli (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to wear string panties. While in line at the mall, they became untied. I was wearing a skirt. FML

#12781216
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13435) - you deserved it (34030)

On 08/28/2010 at 12:54am - misc - by wearingshorts - United States (New York)

Today, while watching my guinea pigs have sex, I got jealous. Yeah. It's been that long. FML

#12751809
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31990) - you deserved it (11589)

On 08/26/2010 at 4:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my date and I went to the movies. After the date, we were both on an instant chat room at our homes. Her personal message displayed "I think I love my ex again." FML

#12746191
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25309) - you deserved it (2599)

On 08/25/2010 at 10:09pm - love - by bevo - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I made a mistake at work that got 7 people fired. I'm scared to leave the office because they're all outside. FML

#12740190
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14598) - you deserved it (62711)

On 08/25/2010 at 3:13pm - work - by Joel - United States (California)

Today, I was working as a camp counselor helping a five year old girl. I heard her mumble, "My grandpa is getting married on Saturday." I enthusiastically replied and told her how exciting that was! Only after did I realize that she said 'buried'. FML

#12738391
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25708) - you deserved it (8178)

On 08/25/2010 at 12:32pm - misc - by counselor - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was enjoying a nice shower in the morning. While I was massaging the shampoo out of my hair, I saw the gardener walking past my bathroom window, yelling "Good morning" and waving in my direction. My left boob politely waved back at him. FML

#12726164
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13468) - you deserved it (24112)

On 08/24/2010 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by AlexaSt2611 (woman) - Paraguay (Central)

Today, I got a text from my boyfriend whilst on the train home from spending the weekend with him at his Grandparents house. It said 'Gran says to tell you that the bin beside the toilet is actually for storing spare shampoos and tooth brushes, so could you not put your tampons in it next time?' FML

#12725803
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30974) - you deserved it (7578)

On 08/24/2010 at 7:46pm - love - by DyingOfShame (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I found out the "small termite problem" the inspector told me about wasn't so small when a box from the attic fell through the floor and hit me in the head. FML

#12697631
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26019) - you deserved it (2802)

On 08/23/2010 at 5:03am - health - by concusion - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally found my cellphone when I heard WHACKWHACKWHACK inside the washing machine. FML

#12621906
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14022) - you deserved it (24998)

On 08/19/2010 at 7:25am - misc - by FreeToFly3733 - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my Mom felt the need to walk around school and tell everyone to be nice to me because I just started my period. FML

#12616520
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55851) - you deserved it (3676)

On 08/19/2010 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Jordid - United States (Colorado)

Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML

#12524793
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25613) - you deserved it (3293)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:10pm - work - by hobosarea-holes (man) - United States (New York)



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