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shockwave259

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shockwave259
  • Town/Country : Rainier, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 November 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 554
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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shockwave259's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter and husband decided to surprise me at work. A whole bunch of my co-workers were standing around me when she ran up and hugged me. Her face is level with my crotch. She immediately jumps back from the hug and says "ewwww smells like fish." FML

#14112923
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32857) - you deserved it (11275)

On 12/06/2010 at 9:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter and husband decided to surprise me at work. A whole bunch of my co-workers were standing around me when she ran up and hugged me. Her face is level with my crotch. She immediately jumps back from the hug and says "ewwww smells like fish." FML

#14112923
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32857) - you deserved it (11275)

On 12/06/2010 at 9:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I walked outside to see my friend frantically waving and running at me, yelling something I couldn't understand. I smiled and started to jog over to him until I realized he was screaming "RUN!!!" We spent the next 10 minutes running from his neighbor's 5 vicious chihuahuas. FML

#14080015
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22207) - you deserved it (5931)

On 12/04/2010 at 2:08am - misc - by chi-huaHUA - United States

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

#14058038
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59562) - you deserved it (4678)

On 12/02/2010 at 8:20am - love - by mrdentist -

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me. She wants to try dating women. This is the second time this has happened to me. FML

#13857180
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38137) - you deserved it (5803)

On 11/15/2010 at 8:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my parents asked me if I had a nice time with my girlfriend at the amusement park I took her to yesterday. She was pretty freaked out by some of the rides so without thinking I said, "Yeah, but she sure is a screamer." My parents then exchange a look and say, "Oh trust us, we know." FML

#13836763
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11283) - you deserved it (25600)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

#13773002
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45162) - you deserved it (8492)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my cat learned how to flush the toilet while I was in the shower. His transformation from cute kitten to pure evil entity is now complete. FML

#13762266
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27642) - you deserved it (4914)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I found my son's iPod touch and was looking at a light-saber app. He walked into the living room to see me fighting the cat and making sound effects to myself. FML

#13760701
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6238) - you deserved it (26531)

On 11/08/2010 at 1:07am - animals - by yay! - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

#13756412
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18855) - you deserved it (56869)

On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was accused of shop-lifting by an old lady in a supermarket. Having proven myself innocent, I tried to storm off to show my displeasure at the situation. In my haste to make a dramatic exit, I tried to go out of the entrance and walked straight into the automatic door. FML

#13723966
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19656) - you deserved it (11098)

On 11/05/2010 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Gwynedd)

Today, I came home to find my younger daughter left her silly band collection on the carpet in front of the fireplace. I now have melted unicorns and princesses stuck in my carpet. FML

#13716759
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20110) - you deserved it (3328)

On 11/04/2010 at 5:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I saw a portable speed camera on the highway and braked hard. I caused a 4 car pile-up and my car is totaled. It wasn't a speed camera. FML

#13698951
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5355) - you deserved it (47299)

On 11/03/2010 at 7:23am - misc - by Gemma - United Kingdom (London)



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