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shift_love

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shift_love
  • Town/Country : gregs place, America
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2336
  • Number of comments : 196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About shift_love : I'm old Greg.

shift_love's last visitors

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shift_love's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of shift_love's badges

shift_love's favorite FMLs

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48954) - you deserved it (8615)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my psycho and now ex-girlfriend accused me of cheating on her with my own mother. FML

#20625307
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52298) - you deserved it (3449)

On 04/27/2013 at 2:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Lithuania (Kauno Apskritis)

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

#20566988
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18368) - you deserved it (48194)

On 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by fuck you dad (man) - Ireland (Monaghan)

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML

#20539287
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45294) - you deserved it (22605)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:33am - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML

#20524189
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36486) - you deserved it (5848)

On 02/27/2013 at 8:49am - misc - by anony (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I heard an owl near my house. I got excited, as they are not common in the area, and I listened intently to try and locate the source of the sound. After a few minutes, I realized I was not listening to an owl, but to my mother's sex noises. FML

#20480168
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43565) - you deserved it (4519)

On 01/26/2013 at 6:50pm - intimacy - by movingout - Australia (Victoria)

Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML

#20477055
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19490) - you deserved it (35190)

On 01/24/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by chase (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

#20199452
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20868) - you deserved it (2172)

On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

#20191552
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9665) - you deserved it (19658)

On 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm - work - by whitecollar - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I was watching a video from the 80s on sexual dysfunctions, and I noticed that one of the boys in the film looked strangely like my dad when he was younger. After a little investigation, I now know that in his youth, my dad had a crippling masturbation problem. FML

#20181345
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36306) - you deserved it (3184)

On 11/27/2012 at 4:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

#20160393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23518) - you deserved it (7191)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML

#20128340
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21578) - you deserved it (4181)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my mom decided the time was right to give me the sex talk. Towards the end, I had to excuse myself to the bathroom. As I came back, I overheard my dad telling my mom that I'm so unpopular, the only time I'll get laid is when I'm being put in a coffin. FML

#20091141
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30223) - you deserved it (2174)

On 09/27/2012 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by linn (woman) - United States

Today, I spent hours crafting a tiara to look like the princess from my boyfriend's favourite game series, Zelda. I sent him a picture of me wearing it, and got the reply: "Sure, that's nice, but you'd be better as Majora." FML

#20079245
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16166) - you deserved it (2796)

On 09/19/2012 at 1:25pm - love - by MT (woman) - Finland

Today, my dog, who has been specially trained to go for help when I'm having a seizure, went to alert my parents downstairs that I was having an emergency. The "emergency" was me masturbating. FML

#20052579
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25634) - you deserved it (7440)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by thewhompingwillow (man) - United States (Virginia)



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