About shibainu519 : Hi! :D
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10311) - you deserved it (22514)
On 01/11/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by bunnyluver4545 - United States (Texas)
Today, someone put dog turds underneath all the decorative reindeers' butts in my front yard. The chief suspect is my curmudgeonly, holidays-hating fuckball of a neighbor. Last week he repositioned them in very suggestive poses. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16578) - you deserved it (4155)
On 12/20/2011 at 9:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I had to sit and listen to my co-worker moan about how early he has to get up tomorrow to go on his ski holiday in France over Christmas. He also complained about how tiring skiing is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23149) - you deserved it (1683)
On 12/20/2011 at 6:54am - work - by dogwheels - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)
Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23840) - you deserved it (4088)
On 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by anne (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23840) - you deserved it (4088)
On 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by anne (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27992) - you deserved it (4973)
On 12/16/2011 at 9:29pm - kids - by DocBastard (man) - Reserved
Today, my brother lost his first tooth, so I told him the tooth fairy is going to give him money. He now thinks The Rock is going to show up in his room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25488) - you deserved it (5831)
On 11/23/2011 at 2:14pm - kids - by G. Briones -
Today, I got my braces off. I also got my tongue pierced. Both by my orthodontist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29978) - you deserved it (2255)
On 11/17/2011 at 4:27pm - health - by OUCH. - United States
Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26913) - you deserved it (4761)
On 09/14/2011 at 7:06am - misc - by funnymanjoe - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got junk punched by a midget in Sears for giving him "a funny look." I was trying to read the price of the fridge he was standing in front of. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21250) - you deserved it (2124)
On 09/06/2011 at 9:14pm - misc - by b3ardown23 - United States
Today, my boyfriend came before I'd even unbuttoned my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47620) - you deserved it (5425)
On 06/27/2011 at 4:56am - intimacy - by Username - United States
Today, I hit a dead deer that had been left in the middle of the road. My car started to make a funny noise and smell, so I pulled over to check it, thinking I blew the tire on some antlers. The deer got stuck in my front wheel, and I'd dragged it more than a mile. And it wasn't actually dead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14956) - you deserved it (31125)
On 01/21/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that since no other procedures are working, I was required to stop eating, and drink a bunch of foul tasting 'goo', which will in turn give me constant diarrhea. This will then prepare me nicely for the long tube with a camera on the end of which will be shoved up my rectum. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17081) - you deserved it (2835)
On 01/18/2011 at 8:51pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, it's my sixteenth birthday. The only gift I got was from myself: a positive pregnancy test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16173) - you deserved it (61726)
On 12/18/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my friend and I offered a hot girl a lift home from campus. I was sitting in the passenger seat and she climbed in behind me. As I adjusted my seat forward to give her more leg room, my friend pulled off - slamming my seat back into her legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17392) - you deserved it (2828)
On 10/03/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by tukkies (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)
Monday 17 June 2013
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