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shellykjelly's favorite FMLs
Today, I saw a cute guy at the coffee shop reading a book. Wanting to be friendly, I smiled as I approached and asked what he was reading. He returned the smile and said, "Minding your damn business, by Fuck Off." FML
by nevaagain / 08/19/2016 at 4:00pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love
Today, someone drove into my car at an intersection and drove off. Luckily, I got the car's registration plate and called the cops on them. Turns out, it was my boyfriend's brother's girlfriend, who was illegally driving without a license. Now everyone's mad at me for getting her in trouble. FML
by Innocent / 08/18/2016 at 7:03pm / New Zealand / Transportation
Today, I asked a girl what time she'd like me to pick her up for our date tonight. She didn't know what I was talking about. It seems like, after months of sweaty palms, nervous smiles, and awkward sentences, I only dreamed she said yes to going out. FML
by LoveStinks / 08/18/2016 at 6:56am / Love
by Ummm / 08/03/2016 at 3:45pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Heknowsnothing / 07/13/2016 at 5:09pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
by Reek / 06/22/2016 at 10:29am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, like every other day, my roommate's alarm began to go off at 7:30am. What time does she have to wake up? 10:00am. Why does she have her alarm go off for two and a half hours? Because last semester she needed it to go off then and she is too lazy to change it. FML
by fckdorms / 05/09/2016 at 10:04am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by dvddtraveller / 04/22/2016 at 5:25pm / United States (California) / Love
by humanshield / 04/10/2016 at 12:49pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
Today, I was taking the train home from another unsuccessful job interview. As I was sitting there, I felt the urge to yawn, but before I could raise my hand to cover my mouth some guy stuck his finger in it. FML
by tittyboomboom / 03/24/2016 at 9:16am / Australia / Transportation
by billjoebob424 / 03/09/2016 at 7:01pm / Canada / Love
by Puddlepop / 03/01/2016 at 4:20am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by bxilee / 02/27/2016 at 9:48pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 02/25/2016 at 4:55pm / United States / Health
Today, while doing the grocery shopping with my boyfriend we came across another woman also out shopping, who looked shockingly like me despite her being another race, hair color and the like. The second he saw her, he blurted out, ''Oh, it's a pretty version of you!'' FML
by FuglyBetty / 02/24/2016 at 5:48pm / Norway (Aust-Agder) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…