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shellykjelly

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shellykjelly

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1277
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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shellykjelly's page activity

Visits<b>SadSouthernBell</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 9:34am<b>missambitious</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 9:29pm<b>CoolNoodle</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 4:03pm<b>MisterEx</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 4:41pm<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 1:49pm<b>jinxy333</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 12:55pm<b>MrConcise</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 9:17am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 10:04am<b>clevergirl98</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 8:27am<b>candygirl2015</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 3:22am<b>AllGoodNamesGone</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 10:34am<b>Deniedmydignity</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 1:49pm<b>I_Am_Lamp_</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 6:25pm<b>photographer49</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 1:09pm<b>skeletcn</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 2:59am<b>Dramori</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 6:50am<b>StressedDesserts</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 4:13pm<b>1Nsan3</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 1:18am

Fucked!<b>MisterEx</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 2:15pm

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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shellykjelly's favorite FMLs

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30288) - you deserved it (2133)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I submitted a poem for my English class. I had fun writing it, so I wrote a second which was not nearly as good. My procrastinator of a friend never did his, so I gave him my extra poem. Mine was given a 75% while "his" received a 93%. FML

#21431507
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22209) - you deserved it (8059)

On 06/24/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by WhyIHateTeachers - United States (Florida)

Today, after constant avoidance, I saw the man who slept with my mother and caused my parents to get divorced. I desperately wanted to punch him in the face, but instead I had to smile and shake his hand as he gave me my diploma. FML

#21431164
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34906) - you deserved it (2095)

On 06/24/2015 at 1:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, from across the parking lot, I saw a woman break into my car and steal my "Handicapped parking" placard. Guess why I couldn't stop her. FML

#21427634
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34536) - you deserved it (1710)

On 06/17/2015 at 3:18pm - misc - by hobbled - United States

Today, my mother got heartburn. She claimed she only gets heartburn when she is near a pregnant woman. She threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't take a pregnancy test, despite there being no way I was pregnant. Turns out, I am pregnant, and my mother's ego has never been bigger. FML

#21427606
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29948) - you deserved it (8541)

On 06/17/2015 at 2:09pm - kids - by RecentCollegeGrad (woman) -

Today, my co-worker told me how "lucky" I am that I "chose" to be a lesbian, because I don't have to deal with "guy drama". I spent two years of my adolescence sleeping at a bus stop and begging strangers for money after I got kicked out of home. FML

#21427509
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34432) - you deserved it (3158)

On 06/17/2015 at 9:31am - misc - by Lesbihonest (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my parents bought my 11-year-old brother a MacBook for my birthday. FML

#21425434
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29374) - you deserved it (1964)

On 06/13/2015 at 12:34pm - kids - by thanks for the $5 gift voucher (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was joking around with my manager about faking an injury to collect Worker's Compensation. Then I actually slipped and sprained my foot, and now my manager thinks I'm lying. FML

#21425191
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23137) - you deserved it (11160)

On 06/12/2015 at 10:06pm - work - by nancypants1124 - United States

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML

#21423894
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35142) - you deserved it (6957)

On 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I lost my virginity. He then told me, in tears, how bad he felt about leaving his dog alone for the night. FML

#21422070
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25543) - you deserved it (2435)

On 06/07/2015 at 12:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Gisborne)

Today, I found out my husband potty trained my stubborn three year old son who prefers diapers. He managed this by peeing with him and "sword-fighting" with their urine streams. I now have to clean pee off the ground every time he urinates. FML

#21421959
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25104) - you deserved it (2229)

On 06/06/2015 at 9:17pm - kids - by diapersplease (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked outside to get the paper, and saw a dying bird I assumed had flown into the window. It was warm so I thought it might still be alive. I wasn't wearing my glasses though, and was trying to nurse a dog turd back to life. FML

#21420933
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25589) - you deserved it (9799)

On 06/04/2015 at 10:17pm - animals - by nerderer (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my 14 year old brother and 9 year old sister were fighting. My brother said "You suck!" to my sister, and she replied with "You swallow!" FML



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