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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1572
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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shellykjelly's page activity

Visits<b>swishy25</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 9:03pm<b>Nathan_Henry</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 10:48pm<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 5:26pm<b>Gwen4var</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 9:16am<b>flyingmind</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:22am<b>Twill3422</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 6:55am<b>mewtwonow</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 3:28pm<b>four0seven</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 3:14am<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 10:10am<b>wildnargles</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 6:46am<b>SampleSext</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 1:50am<b>KayDee29</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 12:24am<b>Soninuva</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 11:07pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 8:06pm<b>CoolNoodle</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 2:10pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 6:27pm<b>faerieonacid</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 11:00am<b>Hunkapoo</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 12:54am

Fucked!<b>Twill3422</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 6:13am<b>mewtwonow</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 8:10am<b>MisterEx</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 2:15pm

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shellykjelly's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend told me she has decided to become a stay-at-home mom for our dog. FML

Today, I accidentally threw a glass of iced tea in my own face, because the restaurant I'd patronized for over a decade switched from heavy glass mugs to identical light-as-a-feather plastic mugs. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23634) - you deserved it (4148)

On 09/16/2015 at 2:53am - misc - by BlueMacaw (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was signing with my deaf brother at a local McDonald's. We were having a laugh about a game we played last night when this morbidly obese woman waddled over to us. She was utterly convinced we were "talking shit" about her and made a scene about our "hand gestures." Seriously? FML


I agree, your life sucks (26950) - you deserved it (1347)

On 09/15/2015 at 6:31pm - misc - by Stairs? Noooooo - United States (California)

Today, I decided to give a break to my students halfway through my 3 hour lecture. The break became the end of the lecture, because nobody came back. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20975) - you deserved it (4241)

On 09/15/2015 at 4:40pm - work - by MedHistory - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was let go from my dream job for requesting Photoshop as well as Illustrator. I was hired to create marketing materials. Guess I should have just used Paint. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22311) - you deserved it (1446)

On 09/08/2015 at 11:34pm - work - by :'( - United States (California)

Today, I was having a relaxing "wank", as they might say on Doctor Who, when a large spider descended from its web and came practically eye-to-eye with me. I screamed like a bitch and fell off my bed, pants around my ankles. Then my sister ran in to see what was wrong. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20419) - you deserved it (7785)

On 09/04/2015 at 10:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that my 100-pound Rottweiler is absolutely terrified of (drumroll please) orange peels. Yup. A byproduct of my lunch will turn this hulking monolith with teeth into a whimpering puddle of pee. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22880) - you deserved it (1909)

On 09/02/2015 at 10:30pm - animals - by pansypup - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I said I wouldn't find her attractive in 20 years. What I actually said was that I wouldn't sleep with her mother now, who happens to be 20 years older than her. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23802) - you deserved it (3034)

On 08/25/2015 at 7:55am - love - by Shelling Ford - Germany (Bayern)

Today, my drill sergeant was yelling at me and asking me questions. I got a question wrong, and he asked me if I am a "Shit Sandwich". I replied "Yes sir, with extra cheese." I'm running miles till the day I die. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24683) - you deserved it (8971)

On 08/17/2015 at 9:55pm - work - by BarhydtBran - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend dyed her hair from blonde to brunette. An hour later, she found one of her blonde hairs on my pillow, and accused me of cheating. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27632) - you deserved it (1869)

On 08/17/2015 at 6:46pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was on hold with a company for so long that I was able to shower, clean my house, and was using the hold music to put my son to sleep. FML

Today, I discovered my new step-dad has a rule about the shower. After three minutes, he turns the water off at the source. I had to beg him to turn it back on whilst covered in shampoo suds, and the only way I could get him to give me another minute was to forfeit my phone for the week. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31027) - you deserved it (2088)

On 08/07/2015 at 7:24am - misc - by ruserious (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I fed my 4ft python a live rat for the first time. He now has a new friend he won't let me near. FML

Today, on my second day at my new job, a customer called my manager with a complaint about me. He said I put the cheese "upside down" on his sandwich, and that made it taste bad. FML

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