Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

shaww

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

shaww

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1910
  • Number of comments : 126
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About shaww : Just a simple guy. I'm a senior in high school, I am a grammar nazi... so beware.
Wanna know me? Message me

shaww's page activity

Visits<b>bobfrickindole</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 12:38pm<b>Shakazulu1216</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 5:32pm<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 6:54pm<b>SpeedToast</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 11:36am<b>Jumbabaginji</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:35am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:59pm<b>saysomethun</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 9:15am<b>MissSarcasm01</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 1:50pm<b>Fiercedeity2714</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 9:30am<b>MissHeartSihk</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 2:52pm<b>BradTheBrony</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 8:55am<b>lenardMcCravits</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 2:43pm<b>Goodtobebad</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 8:47am<b>Chimera0</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 7:10am<b>jacobfaulkner</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 2:29am<b>thatkidmal</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 1:42am<b>samm12099</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:55pm<b>NicoleErin</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 10:33pm

shaww's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of shaww's badges

shaww's favorite FMLs

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
681 comments

I agree, your life sucks (691560) - you deserved it (55723)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
681 comments

I agree, your life sucks (691560) - you deserved it (55723)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML

#958764
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60789) - you deserved it (6882)

On 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm - work - by brad3720 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
925 comments

I agree, your life sucks (346180) - you deserved it (38544)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my tampon string was hanging from my bathing suit. My boyfriend thought it was a thread hanging from my bikini bottom. He publicly pulled out my tampon. FML

#784043
455 comments

I agree, your life sucks (406325) - you deserved it (66811)

On 04/03/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by rebekah (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I babysat for two little girls, who wanted to play 'mermaids'. I smiled, and said that I would love to play with them. The older girl laughed, saying "You can't be a mermaid. Mermaids are pretty." FML

#614734
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77130) - you deserved it (4544)

On 03/25/2009 at 11:45pm - kids - by babysitter (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it's my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to iTunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation. FML

#580113
484 comments

I agree, your life sucks (589786) - you deserved it (37939)

On 03/24/2009 at 5:15pm - misc - by happybirthday (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, as a veteran blood donor, I made a friend who was donating for the first time- I told her not to be scared and that I've been doing it for six years and that it was a great way to help people. While at the snack area afterwards, I passed out, started convulsing and went into shock. FML

#573136
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64428) - you deserved it (6808)

On 03/24/2009 at 8:43am - health - by bridalqueen (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we got inside my mom yells to me "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML

#492829
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (128196) - you deserved it (7785)

On 03/20/2009 at 5:16pm - misc - by megan228 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I decided to have sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pockets. Turns out, he had written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML

#473847
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (125096) - you deserved it (12702)

On 03/19/2009 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by ufhdafuhds (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: