Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

shaww

Online | Search for a member

shaww

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1917
  • Number of comments : 126
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About shaww : Just a simple guy. I'm a senior in high school, I am a grammar nazi... so beware.
Wanna know me? Message me

shaww's page activity

Visits<b>bobfrickindole</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 12:38pm<b>Shakazulu1216</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 5:32pm<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 6:54pm<b>SpeedToast</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 11:36am<b>Jumbabaginji</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:35am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:59pm<b>saysomethun</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 9:15am<b>MissSarcasm01</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 1:50pm<b>Fiercedeity2714</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 9:30am<b>MissHeartSihk</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 2:52pm<b>BradTheBrony</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 8:55am<b>lenardMcCravits</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 2:43pm<b>Goodtobebad</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 8:47am<b>Chimera0</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 7:10am<b>jacobfaulkner</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 2:29am<b>thatkidmal</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 1:42am<b>samm12099</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:55pm<b>NicoleErin</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 10:33pm

shaww's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of shaww's badges

shaww's favorite FMLs

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

#21198798
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48168) - you deserved it (4342)

On 07/04/2014 at 7:17pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I came home from vacation, only to find my neighbours relaxing on my patio, and their kids swimming in my pool. FML

#21197297
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48636) - you deserved it (4140)

On 07/03/2014 at 12:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, my dad finished installing our new home security system. One of the features lets him control any light in the house from his phone. He keeps trying to piss me off by turning my bedroom light on at random intervals. I don't know how to make it stop, and I can't sleep. FML

#21196465
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46575) - you deserved it (4468)

On 07/02/2014 at 5:52pm - misc - by pissed off (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

#21196202
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42580) - you deserved it (23828)

On 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by boob sisters (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, as I was picking up my 5-year-old brother from school, he hugged a girl from his class to say goodbye. His classmate's mom and I looked at each other, thinking it was adorable, until my brother decided to dry hump the side of his classmate's thigh. FML

Today, my grandma got a new boyfriend. She dumped the old one because "His wife was taking too long to die." FML

#21195046
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49684) - you deserved it (4161)

On 07/01/2014 at 1:31pm - love - by carebear1228 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55834) - you deserved it (5176) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I sped off down the road, then realized to my horror that my cat was clinging to the roof of the car. FML

Today, after leaving my mom's house, I got 4 text messages from her about how I was a terrible person for not saying goodbye to my sister when I left. The "sister" she was referring to is the family dog. FML

#21192815
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39312) - you deserved it (4171)

On 06/29/2014 at 6:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my wife has a bruise on her cheek from a nasty trip while practicing her yoga. She now thinks it's hilarious to flinch in public when I get near her, and keeps telling people she "walked into a door". I've gotten more dirty looks than I can count. FML

#21192543
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59771) - you deserved it (4619)

On 06/29/2014 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, after nearly three weeks of hard work, I finally completed my best drawing yet, a self-portrait. I was incredibly excited to take it to class tomorrow. That is, until I came home from a walk later on, only to find my brother had drawn a stick figure on it, wanking into my face. FML

#21192529
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42133) - you deserved it (3869)

On 06/29/2014 at 1:08pm - work - by ~~~ (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I went to my friend's house to give him some moral support as he came out of the closet to his family. I left with a black eye. FML

#21192141
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41619) - you deserved it (5784)

On 06/29/2014 at 1:04am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML

#21192088
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47939) - you deserved it (3500)

On 06/29/2014 at 12:16am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I came home and saw my cat all snuggled up with another cat on the sofa. I thought it was the cutest thing ever, until I remembered that I only have one cat. FML

#21191841
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41617) - you deserved it (4602)

On 06/28/2014 at 8:09pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I spent the whole day doing a 500 piece puzzle. The last piece didn't fit. FML

#21191359
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42504) - you deserved it (6060)

On 06/28/2014 at 10:08am - misc - by Puzzlepiece - Australia (New South Wales)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: