shaww

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Offline (the 09/07/2015 at 11:07pm)

shaww

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10564
  • Number of comments : 129
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About shaww : Just a simple guy. I am a grammar nazi... so beware.
Wanna know me? Message me

shaww's page activity

Visits<b>Savagexxx008</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 6:47pm<b>arsh_fz</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 12:00pm<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 11:53am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 7:54pm<b>11Tec11</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 2:47pm<b>cowofthenorth</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 5:23am<b>jeffrey1992</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 7:03pm<b>CliffPaul</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 1:27am<b>joco4</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 2:07pm<b>Frowny</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 11:48pm<b>couchcat</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 7:10pm<b>myoukei</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 12:06am<b>nachomanwon</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:36pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:42pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 7:54am<b>enderman99125</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:07pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:51pm<b>bmarrott</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 11:22pm

Fucked!<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 5:53pm<b>joco4</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 8:08pm

shaww's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of shaww's badges

shaww's favorite FMLs

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

by soundslikeadumbcommentersituation / 07/11/2014 at 4:34pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I texted my mom asking how she was doing. Apparently she's great, and on her honeymoon. I didn't know she was getting married, or that my parents had just gotten divorced. FML

by morgan_rumm / 07/11/2014 at 4:02pm / Miscellaneous

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2014 at 7:03am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I was stuck on a campus tour with my subtly racist mother who, in an attempt to seem open-minded, deemed it appropriate to refer to our black tour guide as "Sistah". FML

by look how totally not racist I am! / 07/10/2014 at 11:32pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the public library for the first time ever. The librarian told me I couldn't get a library card because I had an outstanding balance of $130.00 from 1995. I was born in 1991. FML

by library book / 07/10/2014 at 1:27am / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, my boss delivered some flowers and a sympathy card signed by everyone in the office to my cubicle. The card said, "Sorry your mom died". My mom isn't dead. I don't know where they got the idea from and no one believes me. They said that denial is part of grieving. FML

by ninnang / 07/09/2014 at 5:37pm / United States (Hawaii) / Work

Today, a grown man yelled at me because he'd been waiting for 15 minutes and still hadn't been seated or had his order taken. We were at a self-serve breakfast buffet. FML

by Anonymous / 07/09/2014 at 12:54pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Work

Today, at my job at a frozen yogurt shop, an elderly woman gladly announced that I'd be seeing a lot of her due to the vaginal infection that she has. Thank you for that, ma'am. FML

by Sun_Kissed18 / 07/09/2014 at 3:26am / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, an elderly lady sat next to me on a bench, and started telling me out of the blue about how bad it is to have saggy boobs. I was uncomfortable enough at the unwanted info, without her then looking at my chest and adding, "But I expect you already know that, dear." FML

by madamefuxalittle / 07/08/2014 at 4:52pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I helped my dad push our broken-down truck from the driveway onto the tire ramp. Truck didn't make it; neither did my leg. FML

by crippled / 07/08/2014 at 4:40am / United States (Nevada) / Health

Today, my boyfriend said that he doesn't have to marry me because we coincidentally have the same last name. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2014 at 9:27pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I went to see the school counselor to schedule my classes for school. She asked me if I knew how to speak English. My parents are Chinese and I don't even know how to speak Chinese. I've lived in America my whole life. Plus, I even spoke to her in English to ask about classes. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2014 at 9:27pm / Work

Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML

by Anonymous / 07/05/2014 at 1:53pm / United States / Work

Today, my teenage daughter faked a suicide because I bought her a Samsung instead of an iPhone for her birthday. FML

by iphonerevolution / 07/04/2014 at 8:15pm / South Africa / Kids

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

by zl5 / 07/04/2014 at 7:17pm / New Zealand (Wellington) / Work