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Offline (the 09/07/2015 at 11:07pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10036
  • Number of comments : 129
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About shaww : Just a simple guy. I am a grammar nazi... so beware.
Wanna know me? Message me

shaww's page activity

Visits<b>Savagexxx008</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 6:47pm<b>arsh_fz</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 12:00pm<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 11:53am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 7:54pm<b>11Tec11</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 2:47pm<b>cowofthenorth</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 5:23am<b>jeffrey1992</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 7:03pm<b>CliffPaul</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 1:27am<b>joco4</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 2:07pm<b>Frowny</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 11:48pm<b>couchcat</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 7:10pm<b>myoukei</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 12:06am<b>nachomanwon</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:36pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:42pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 7:54am<b>enderman99125</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:07pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:51pm<b>bmarrott</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 11:22pm

Fucked!<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 5:53pm<b>joco4</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 8:08pm

shaww's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of shaww's badges

shaww's favorite FMLs

Today, I was shopping when I suddenly slipped on the wet floor and my basket and my groceries were flung everywhere. Moments later, one of the cleaners walked over holding a "wet floor" sign, saw me and laughed. FML

by ms98 / 08/05/2014 at 12:52am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

by Anonymous / 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my girlfriend interrupted my proposal to take a selfie with the ice cream I had just bought her. She then said no. FML

by Anonymous / 08/02/2014 at 12:00am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I found out that my wife of 12 years has slept with the workmen we've had working on our long term building project. They call her the "quickie queen". FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2014 at 2:27pm / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2014 at 1:39pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML

by Is that..? / 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I babysat a 9-year-old kid for the first time. The moment his parents left the house, the little shit looked me dead in the eyes and let me know that if I didn't let him do whatever he wanted, he'd tell his parents that I touched him in his "no-no place". Suddenly I hate kids. FML

by fuck you, kid / 07/16/2014 at 2:56pm / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, I was at the mall in the food court, when some guy asked for my number. I turned him down, but I was impressed with how ballsy he was. Without thinking, I said, "I like your balls!" Half the place instantly fell silent. FML

by akaka / 07/14/2014 at 9:38am / United States (Ohio) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

by NoSexForMe / 07/13/2014 at 3:46am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2014 at 4:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, my brother decided to help me artificially age some of my artwork by singeing the edges slightly. Apparently "my brother set fire to my homework" isn't a valid excuse. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2014 at 12:09pm / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Kids

Today, I was watching adult videos in my apartment. I'm deaf, so I didn't realize my volume was at full blast until I put my hand over the speaker. FML

by weeping_angel_ / 07/12/2014 at 10:00am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date and ate in the park. When I crossed my legs under the table, I scraped my knee and got a lot of splinters in it. When I got back home and started digging out the splinters, my dad furiously demanded to know why I'd been on my knees during the date. FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2014 at 9:36pm / United States (Idaho) / Health

Today, I confided to my boyfriend that I have a condition that causes me to grow thick toe hair. He now won't stop calling me "the sexy Hobbit." FML

by sexyhobbit / 07/11/2014 at 8:26pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

by and god shat / 07/11/2014 at 7:38pm / United States (Oregon) / Animals