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sharkiii

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sharkiii

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 871
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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sharkiii's page activity

Visits<b>brosteptwinner</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 7:33pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 7:35pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/19/2013 at 2:58am<b>DetroitDov</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 2:00am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 4:28am<b>CVTTRVN</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 11:15pm<b>RodzillaX</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 12:03am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 12:02pm<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 4:39pm

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Inception

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of sharkiii's badges

sharkiii's favorite FMLs

Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML

#20841540
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61404) - you deserved it (7121)

On 08/17/2013 at 10:18am - love - by why - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML

#20836995
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68954) - you deserved it (8741)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML

#20829995
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63700) - you deserved it (5874)

On 08/10/2013 at 12:02am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, this weird kid in class asked me on a date. He claims to be a werewolf. His excuse for not being able to turn into one? A "rare disease." His excuse for everyone rejecting him? "Friend-zoning bitches." I was the last resort even for a jackoff "nice guy" werewolf. FML

#20829503
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39750) - you deserved it (3577)

On 08/09/2013 at 6:13pm - misc - by WHAT A NICE GUY YOU ARE, SIR SHITSPAWN!!!1! (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter, who was born in late 2000, mentioned how amazing it is that she'll be alive during the year 3000. I asked her exactly how old she thinks she'll be by then. She said, "Thirty, duh." I've screwed up as a parent, so very badly. FML

#20823686
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61746) - you deserved it (15391)

On 08/06/2013 at 11:19am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I went to my boss's dinner party. My sister, who also works with me, sat across from me at the table. I felt her kick me so I kicked her back. Then I heard something start crying. It was the boss's baby crawling under the table. FML

#20823157
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57852) - you deserved it (19538)

On 08/06/2013 at 1:07am - work - by offuckingcourse - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after learning that my wife has been cheating on me, I decided to distract myself by playing The Sims. Not long after I began, my Sim's wife basically started cheating on him. FML

#20816365
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57757) - you deserved it (6075)

On 08/02/2013 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

#20812145
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65505) - you deserved it (4522)

On 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43223) - you deserved it (28966)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was on drive-thru where I work. Our policy is that we can give free treats to dogs that come through. A woman came in and I noticed her dog. Without a thought, I grabbed a treat and asked if her dog wanted one. I looked again. The 'dog' was her daughter. FML

#20792109
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51625) - you deserved it (25669)

On 07/19/2013 at 9:54am - work - by Treats For Days - Canada (Alberta)

Today, as I was about to enter a public restroom, a man walked out and said, "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of my life." It was the ladies' restroom. FML

#20785565
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48486) - you deserved it (3257)

On 07/16/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was marking exams. I then had to explain to many of the students that (a) pigs are not aquatic animals and (b) sharks do not have lungs. These are university students. FML

#20784658
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45428) - you deserved it (3934)

On 07/15/2013 at 5:14pm - work - by lame-o-prof (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML

#20784153
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54045) - you deserved it (3742)

On 07/15/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by leeceetaylor99 - United States (Texas)

Today, my water broke. I called my mom, who had agreed to watch my other two kids while I went to the hospital. When I asked her to come over, she just said, "Sorry, now isn't a good time." FML

#20781242
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51214) - you deserved it (3577)

On 07/14/2013 at 12:32am - health - by Upset Mommy - United States

Today, my boyfriend convinced me do an Insanity workout with him. I passed out during the warmup. FML

#20776146
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48393) - you deserved it (12474)

On 07/11/2013 at 3:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)



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