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sharkiii's favorite FMLs
Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML
by I hate that game / 11/23/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/08/2013 at 8:46pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML
by overly nationalistic redneck / 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was pushed off of a glacier by a very angry tourist. Why? I work as a glacier guide, and apparently some people find it overly frustrating to be informed that there isn't a café on the glacier. FML
by Quasimodo / 10/18/2013 at 8:40am / Norway (Hordaland) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/20/2013 at 5:00pm / Hungary (Szeged) / Love
by Kaka_Karrot_Kake / 09/13/2013 at 9:49am / United States (Texas) / Money
by Grand Slam / 09/10/2013 at 2:44pm / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Miscellaneous
Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML
by Anonymous / 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by swana99 / 09/04/2013 at 4:39pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, tired of everyone forgetting my birthday, I traveled half way around the world to spend my 40th at a five star resort just to try and make it special. The hotel brought me a cake with someone else's name on it. FML
by nevercatchabreak / 08/31/2013 at 4:16am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by fartz / 08/31/2013 at 2:04am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Alice / 08/28/2013 at 6:33am / United States (Oregon) / Kids
Today, I had a group presentation. I kept zipping my jacket up and down nervously. As I waited for my turn, I realized a bunch of classmates staring at me. I forgot that in the morning rush, I only put on a jacket. I only had a bra on underneath. FML
by xxSecretAngelxx / 08/19/2013 at 2:35pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, my band informed me that our gig this afternoon was actually a wedding. Whose wedding? My ex-wife's, along with the guy she cheated on me with. For their first dance, I had to sing what used to be our song. FML
by Love stinks / 08/19/2013 at 9:06am / United States / Love
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, my mother was vacuuming my room and found a towel under my bed. She asked "why does it smell… Today, I got a text message while driving home. I checked after arriving, and found it was a kinky… Today, I saw a video in class about women aged 65+ and their sex lives. An elderly, blind woman was…
- Today, My two Co-Workers and I realized that we have been working for the same company for years as… Today, my boss called me in to work on my only day off in two weeks. After working more than a full… Today, my bed broke down in the middle. My crush offered to fix it for me, but I can't have people…